The Big Announcement (and the little one too!)

The series I did on young adult ministry was intended to highlight what I have learned and experienced ministering to young adults over the past decade.
Through the years I have found that my fire and passion to reach and minister to young adults has not waned. Young adults are the quickest growing segment at my current church and instead of feeling threatened, the adults who attend Lighthouse Community Church are excited.

Our FUSION ministry is growing by leaps and bounds and it is with great excitement that we announce our first annual FUSION Conference for Young Adults. All the details are here.

While we plan to have this conference locally each year, it is also our desire to offer this conference to young adults throughout the country. We are currently working with churches in Maryland to do a conference in the Baltimore area and would like to hear from you. If you are a young adult who'd like to have a conference come to your area that focuses on you and your unique needs please contact me at fusionyaministry(at)gmail(dot)com

We are also working on different ways to always have this conference be free for attendees and host churches, so if you are part of a group, organization, or foundation that wishes to invest in the lives of young adults, please contact me at the above email address.

This brings me to the "little" announcement.
For me it is not really little.
With the bulk of my free-time going to the FUSION ministry, I am going to place this blog on permanent hiatus.
As I said, this is not a little decision for me. This blog has been a place where I have shared my heart when I didn't know where else to turn. It has been a place to challenge and encourage people beyond my local sphere.
As you know I have not been posting regularly since last summer.
With the added responsibilities of FUSION this trend will continue.

My plan going forward is to contribute to the FUSION blog on a regular basis where I will be joined by a great young man from our ministry named Anthony. I deeply hope you will follow me there and continue to blessed by the conversations we generate.

As for this blog, it will remain here for several months but I will not be adding posts. Eventually, I will suspend and delete the account.

Again, I want to thank all of you who have followed this ministry.
I invite you to come join me at the FUSION blog!

Young Adult Ministry (part 5): Now What?

As I bring this series on ministry to young adults to a close, I want to look at what is currently happening at my church and some challenges we work to overcome.

In the Summer of 2008 I returned to my CT roots to start the work of Lighthouse Community Church. While serving as a youth and young adult pastor in Maryland I had tried to start a conference specifically for young adults but it never got off the ground. So in the Fall of 2009, I worked with two young men I was discipling to launch Lighthouse “RAW”. The idea behind “RAW” was to get as many unbelieving young adults in the room as possible and to engage them in an open and frank dialogue about faith, God, and spirituality. While “RAW” was fairly successful, I learned that the greatest impact it had was on the young adults of faith who attended. They shared that listening to my conversations strengthened their faith and their ability to defend the faith. In June of 2010 “RAW” was put on hiatus for the Summer, and in the Winter of 2010 FUSION was launched.

Unlike its predecessor, FUSION targets young adults of faith. If these young adults regularly attend church, FUSION seeks to build their faith and equip them to serve in their church. If they do not attend church, FUSION seeks to reconnect them to a growing relationship with God. The intended result is that these young adults will begin impacting their peers with the truth of God’s Word.

FUSION is non-denominational in nature. Any young adult may attend any of our events. All young adults who attend are encouraged to invite their friends.

This leads to our first challenge. I purposely chose to make this a non-denominational ministry because I have found that in this area, young adults have little regard for denominational distinctives. They want to study the Bible and fellowship and are not willing to hold up denominational distinctives as a reason not to do so.
The challenge is that the leaders of their various churches are not so open. I am not disparaging any pastor for trying to protect his members from false-teaching, etc. I go out of my way to meet and speak with any and all local Pastors about the purpose of the group. I explain how this ministry allows 3 young adults from their church to fellowship with 3 young adults from 5 other churches meaning that 18 young adults are now receiving solid Bible teaching and being equipped to go back to their churches to serve. The response is usually polite but what is clear is that Pastors in this area are tribal. They would rather start their own group than send their members to FUSION. I applaud this! If this ministry causes churches to start their own ministries I celebrate. But, the fact is that the root issue is tribal. Interestingly I have found that the closer a church is to me in theology and doctrine, the less likely they are to endorse this ministry.

Another challenge comes from the young adults themselves. I find that many young adults today do not want to be held accountable. It is very hard to disciple a generation who has such a wide definition of “judging”, and has attached such a negative connotation to it. Don’t get me wrong, I deplore judgmentalism, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about a willingness to open ones-self to biblical assessment and correction by another without taking it as an offense. You’ve probably heard the mantra, “Only God can Judge me!” My response is, “Watch out what you wish for!” The bottom line is that a major impetus for spiritual growth is forming relationships whereby we open ourselves to others to assess the good and bad in our life. Young adults are willing to open up to one another but very hesitant to address areas of sin in each others lives. Young adults are not alone in their aversion to this but since it is young adults we are discussing it is worth noting.

The final challenge is ministering to a generation that wants to celebrate the lowest level of accomplishment. Maybe this isn’t a challenge as much as an observation. This is the generation where everyone who played tee ball got a trophy. Mine is the generation (the last of its kind) that only celebrated winners. Second place was the first loser. Today it seems that young adults want to celebrate and be acknowledged for everything. It’s like the wide receiver in the NFL who jumps up and dances after making a routine catch. I yell at the screen, “That’s your job! Thanks for doing your job now get back in the huddle you moron!” I laugh as I write this and admit that I find myself shaking my head at the level of self-congratulations young adults pass along to themselves and expect to receive from those in authority. Oh well, I’m sure I’ve stirred the pot enough, so I’ll close.

FUSION meets one Saturday a month for fellowship, worship, and a time of Bible teaching.
FUSION also meets once a month for a time of fellowship and fun group activities.
FUSION has also spawned “Thirsty Thursdays” which meets at the local Starbucks, twice a month, for the purpose of making mid-week connections.
Visit our website at www/fusionyaministry.com

NEXT WEEK FUSION WILL MAKE SOME MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENTS ON ALL OF IT’S SOCIAL MEDIA OUTLETS, SO STAY TUNED!!!!!

Young Adult Ministry (part 4): Please Check Your Misconceptions at the Door

As we steer this series towards home I have to say that it has been great seeing how much conversation it has produced. Several great comments have come in on the young adult blog here and I am humbled by the remarks I received offline along with the reports from my church’s young adults who have shared with me their peers reactions and the conversations that they have had.

So, here’s my pedigree once again. I assisted with a church plant that targeted inner city youth and young adults. I was a youth and young adult Pastor. In my current church the fastest growing demographic is young adults. My point, I have learned some things over the years that have stood true no matter where I have ministered to young adults. Therefore, in this post I wish to clear up some misconceptions that many churches and church leaders have in regard to young adults and faith.

Misconception #1
Young adults are so self-centered that they care very little about God and faith.
It is exactly because they are self-centered that many young adults DO in fact, care about God and faith. When I say that they are self-centered what I mean is that they are on their own, or trying to be. They are attempting to “make it”, to chase dreams and figure out what matters the most in life. Yes they default to self, last time I checked you and I often do as well. But by and large there is still an openness to explore God and faith. The key is that it must be done in a way that is sincere and relevant. Remember, many of them have an aversion to church created by the level of hypocrisy they have seen in many church going folk. The more open and honest you are with them the more they are willing to allow you to guide them on a faith walk. The more you show them how to think through biblical principles, as opposed to spoon feeding them “do’s” and “dont’s”, the more they appreciate God’s Word.

Misconception #2
In the name of relevance they like it dumbed down.
I believe that God’s Word is relevant. I do not need to make it relevant I simply need to show people it’s relevance and timely nature. This is never more true than when ministering to young adults. BUT, this doesn’t mean that I dumb down the Word or my teaching of it. If a young adult has spent any time in church they have already had the Bible relegated to a bunch of stories. What they want now is to dig in! Whether or not they accept it and incorporate it into their lives, young adults want to dig in and explore all that the Bible has to say about life and any particular topic. They want to see it for themselves. They want someone to slog through tough passages with them. They are smart enough to begin formulating real life application.
One of the young adults from my church recently attended a conference. The main speaker of the conference handled one topic throughout several sessions in the span of two days. I thought it would be great to have this young adult be in an environment where the speaker would lead an effort to “dig in” to a subject.
When the young man returned home I asked how things went. His first line, no lie…”I think he dumbed it down for a mass audience.” My jaw dropped. How could you set up an environment for “concentrated” study then deal in terms of generalities and platitudes?
Don’t be afraid to dig in and dissect passages with young adults!

Misconception #3
If you reach out they won’t respond.
If nothing else, have the courage to engage young adults in conversation.
Utilize the techniques of “Active Listening" to better understand them.
I have found that young adults have a lot of opinions and most of them love to share those opinions. If you are open and honest with them, willing to admit your, and the church’s, faults, they will respond and appreciate your efforts.
What they say of church folk is also true of young adults, “They won’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”


Young adults, have I come anywhere near hitting the mark?
Let me hear from you!
Do you, or have you ministered to young adults?
I’d like to hear of other misconceptions you have experienced.

Young Adult Ministry (part 3): That Was Then

We are half way through a series I am doing on ministry to young adults. This series is being offered on both this blog as well as the young adult ministry blog of my church. While online comments have been sparse, this series has sparked quite a bit of conversation offline. This post is a response to many of the questions and comments I have received in person.

To clarify, I am not saying there was “NO” young adult ministry taking place. As I noted in an earlier post, there was a young adult ministry in place at the church I was serving in 2006, but my point was that it was poorly attended. Some churches offered a “College & Career” group, but these groups were often organized by one or two young adults with little guidance provided by the church.

I’d also like to restate that my findings were not “official” research rather information that was gathered first hand through targeted conversations with young adults living in the Baltimore, MD area in the mid 2000’s. As such, they may or may not be indicative of your particular area and this current time.

Speaking of time, there was also a distinct lack of resources for someone, like myself, looking to reach young adults. My first attempt to minister to young adults came when I taught a Bible study out of my home in 1996. In 2004 I assisted a church plant that targeted young adults. Then, in 2006 I determined to forge a path for this type of ministry. I looked around and saw plenty of Christian conferences and resources for Pastors, teens, men, women, and married couples, but very little was available for young adult ministry.

Today men like Ed Stetzer and Thom Rainer have written books like Lost and Found and Essential Church that chronicle young adult research and assist churches in re-capturing those who have left the church. Jason Hayes and Lifeway have developed a great curriculum for young adult ministry called Threads. They also host several conferences that target young adults. Brian Mosley started the Right Now Campaign with the mission of challenging young adults to trade in the “American dream” in order to serve God and spread the gospel. Authors like Renee Johnson, and Kary Oberbrunner have emerged to speak directly to this generation of young adults. This list is not exhaustive but shows that there is a new effort afoot to empower young adult believers.

However, in 1996, 2004, and even in 2006 these people, their ministries, and their resources were not available. I was on my own! The first two posts in this series reflect my journey to understand and minister to young adults during a time when there were scant resources. Upcoming posts will be reflective of what I have found to be true and effective in the current state of young adult ministry.

So come along for the ride and feel free to comment over the next two weeks as we will explore current misconceptions about young adults and I announce a great new resource for young adults and those who minister to them.

Young Adult Ministry (Part 2): Where’d Everybody Go?

This is part 2 in a series where I'm exploring ministry to young adults. In part 1 I shared some of my personal perceptions of American young adults. You can read that post here. This series is also being highlighted on my church's young adult ministry blog here. Today I will share what I found out when I opened a dialogue with young adults in Maryland. This dialogue took place over the span of almost two years and was conducted with upwards of 100 young adults age 18-30. Many of these young adults grew up regularly attending church. Many of them had not regularly attended church since graduating from high school. In a very informal manner I spoke with them about faith, the church, and their personal walk with God. Ultimately I was trying to find out why so many of them no longer attended church.

In 2006 I was a youth and young adult pastor and could not help but notice that in a church with membership numbers close to a thousand, there were less than a handful of young adults regularly attending church and even less actively participating in the church’s young adult ministry. I set out to find out why and started a series of formal and informal discussions to find out where young adults were.
Here’s what I found out…

1. Many young adults felt that the church did not care about them.
At many churches there was a distinct lack of young adult ministry.
Many of these young adults had grown up in youth group. From age 13 – 18 they had worshiped and grown in an atmosphere specifically catered to them. At age 18 that abruptly ended. Now they were considered adults and were expected to make an unguided transition into “regular” church. No more personal attention, no more age appropriate teaching, and nobody to guide them through the transition. The result was that many of them were left feeling that nobody in the church cared about them.

2. Many young adults felt that the teachings offered by the church did not relate to them and their life circumstances.
As these young adults made the transition into “regular” church they found that their life circumstances did not match those around them. They were not facing midlife crisis, most of them were not raising children, and they certainly weren’t adjusting to retirement.
They acknowledged that pastors mean well, but one size doesn’t always fit all when it comes to sermons. Too many sermons seemed to miss the mark of applying to their life.

3. Many young adults felt that the church was full of hypocrites.
On top of all of this was a powerful undercurrent of distrust. As teenagers many of these young adults had picked up on the hypocrisy prevalent in many churches. They saw parents, and reputed church leaders who acted one way in church but lived another way outside the walls of the church building. Now they were being told that hey needed to join the very group they had disdain for. To them the question was, would they play the game? Would they join the hypocrisy? Would they act spiritual on Sunday knowing that they struggled with sexual purity and a holy lifestyle all week long? Would they attend church on Sunday when they had been out clubbing all night on Saturday? The answer for many was “NO”! They may not be living right, but they would not compound things by acting a certain way in church that was not a proper representation of where they were in their life and walk with God.

4. Some young adults remained connected to their church but still felt that there were almost no opportunities for them to serve in the church.
Then there were the small numbers of young adults who had continued to attend church. It was interesting that this usually occurred when there was a personal contact involved. That is, there was someone in the church who they loved and knew loved them, someone that had invested in their life when they were a teenager. Interestingly, that person was almost never a relative.
However, there was a problem. In most cases these young adults found no place to serve within the church. Most areas of service were occupied by the “adults”, often by people who had been doing the same job for longer than the young adult had been alive. Of course nobody would dare to ask these people to step down, to do such would be an offense.
So here was a small number of young adults, bucking the trend. Often they stood in a gap, still connected with the young adults not in church while being in the church but not connected enough to be actively serving.

Next time I'll share what these young adults believe about God and their personal spiritual journey. But let me hear from you!
Which category have you been in?
What has been your experience?
Are you part of the almost 80% that left church after you graduated from high school or have you stuck it out?
I look forward to hearing from you!

Young Adult Ministry (Part 1): A Personal Perspective

Over the next few posts I’d like to explore ministry to young adults. Today I will share some of my personal perspective on young adults. In subsequent posts I will delve into such topics as misconceptions of young adults and spirituality.

I find myself compelled to explore this topic because it has been dear to my heart for almost ten years. Also, my church’s young adult ministry is really “taking off” and I am finding more and more of my time being dedicated to it. For this reason I will be posting the series on both my personal blog as well as our young adult ministry blog here.

I define young adults as those aged 18-30ish. While some assume adulthood at the point of marriage, I uphold this definition regardless of marital status. I do so because note that in America young adulthood seems to be elongating. My parents lived in the time when it was quite normal to get married soon after graduating from high school. Along with marriage came a “settling down” and an approach to life that revolved around being responsible, i.e. men got a job and provided for their family while women had children and managed the home.

Twelve years ago I got married at age 25. This was common for my time as most of my contemporaries got married soon after completing an undergraduate college degree. Even those who didn’t go to college often held off until their mid-twenties before getting married. However, upon getting married many of us were in no particular rush to have children as we sought to continue establishing our careers. This was the case for both men and women alike. It wasn’t until we’d reached a certain point in our career or financial standing that many of us had children. To be sure, my wife and I were in the minority by waiting seven years into our marriage, and into our 30’s, before having children. My point is that this delayed adulthood.

Today, it is not uncommon for young adults to not get married until they reach their 30’s with children not coming until mid to late 30”s. Young adulthood now clearly stretches through the twenties regardless of whether one attends college or not. Many young adults jump from job to job, often giving up financial security for the sake of comfort. That is, I often encounter young adults who have left good paying jobs because they didn’t want to live within the confines the job required or because they would rather pursue something they consider more fulfilling. Often they fall back on the safety net of their parents, moving back home as they prepare for whatever will come next. As I’ve stated, it’s not uncommon for this pattern to continue into the early 30’s. Even those who stay with their good paying jobs find no rush to get married, I have some thoughts on why that is which I may or may not discuss later. Along with the delay to marry is a delay to pick up the mantle of “responsible adult”. Instead, they choose to enjoy what I call a more sophisticated college lifestyle. You know, still plenty of drinking, video gaming, exploring musical interests (read being in a local band).

All of this to say that young adulthood today often stretches into the 30’s. Even those who get married in their twenties still don’t think in terms of classic responsible adulthood until they get into their thirties.

It is to this generation and mindset that I have sought to minister. Knowing that amid the stress and pressures presented to this group, God is able to do a powerful work. It was in my young adult years that God grabbed a hold of my life and steered it in a direction that many, including myself, never would have guessed. Can he do the same for others? Young adult, can he do the same for you? Or maybe the better question is, will you allow Him to? What does God have to offer you? What do you have to offer God?

I welcome your comments and hope you will follow this series.

Being the Church

I often talk about how we need to "be" the church and "live" church, not merely "go" to church.
This video explains in simple fashion what I am talking about.