Divine Perspectives

The Big Announcement (and the little one too!)

2011-05-17T16:37:00.000-04:00

The series I did on young adult ministry was intended to highlight what I have learned and experienced ministering to young adults over the past decade.
Through the years I have found that my fire and passion to reach and minister to young adults has not waned. Young adults are the quickest growing segment at my current church and instead of feeling threatened, the adults who attend Lighthouse Community Church are excited.

Our FUSION ministry is growing by leaps and bounds and it is with great excitement that we announce our first annual FUSION Conference for Young Adults. All the details are here.

While we plan to have this conference locally each year, it is also our desire to offer this conference to young adults throughout the country. We are currently working with churches in Maryland to do a conference in the Baltimore area and would like to hear from you. If you are a young adult who'd like to have a conference come to your area that focuses on you and your unique needs please contact me at fusionyaministry(at)gmail(dot)com

We are also working on different ways to always have this conference be free for attendees and host churches, so if you are part of a group, organization, or foundation that wishes to invest in the lives of young adults, please contact me at the above email address.

This brings me to the "little" announcement.
For me it is not really little.
With the bulk of my free-time going to the FUSION ministry, I am going to place this blog on permanent hiatus.
As I said, this is not a little decision for me. This blog has been a place where I have shared my heart when I didn't know where else to turn. It has been a place to challenge and encourage people beyond my local sphere.
As you know I have not been posting regularly since last summer.
With the added responsibilities of FUSION this trend will continue.

My plan going forward is to contribute to the FUSION blog on a regular basis where I will be joined by a great young man from our ministry named Anthony. I deeply hope you will follow me there and continue to blessed by the conversations we generate.

As for this blog, it will remain here for several months but I will not be adding posts. Eventually, I will suspend and delete the account.

Again, I want to thank all of you who have followed this ministry.
I invite you to come join me at the FUSION blog!

Young Adult Ministry (part 5): Now What?

2011-05-13T16:11:00.004-04:00

As I bring this series on ministry to young adults to a close, I want to look at what is currently happening at my church and some challenges we work to overcome.

In the Summer of 2008 I returned to my CT roots to start the work of Lighthouse Community Church. While serving as a youth and young adult pastor in Maryland I had tried to start a conference specifically for young adults but it never got off the ground. So in the Fall of 2009, I worked with two young men I was discipling to launch Lighthouse “RAW”. The idea behind “RAW” was to get as many unbelieving young adults in the room as possible and to engage them in an open and frank dialogue about faith, God, and spirituality. While “RAW” was fairly successful, I learned that the greatest impact it had was on the young adults of faith who attended. They shared that listening to my conversations strengthened their faith and their ability to defend the faith. In June of 2010 “RAW” was put on hiatus for the Summer, and in the Winter of 2010 FUSION was launched.

Unlike its predecessor, FUSION targets young adults of faith. If these young adults regularly attend church, FUSION seeks to build their faith and equip them to serve in their church. If they do not attend church, FUSION seeks to reconnect them to a growing relationship with God. The intended result is that these young adults will begin impacting their peers with the truth of God’s Word.

FUSION is non-denominational in nature. Any young adult may attend any of our events. All young adults who attend are encouraged to invite their friends.

This leads to our first challenge. I purposely chose to make this a non-denominational ministry because I have found that in this area, young adults have little regard for denominational distinctives. They want to study the Bible and fellowship and are not willing to hold up denominational distinctives as a reason not to do so.
The challenge is that the leaders of their various churches are not so open. I am not disparaging any pastor for trying to protect his members from false-teaching, etc. I go out of my way to meet and speak with any and all local Pastors about the purpose of the group. I explain how this ministry allows 3 young adults from their church to fellowship with 3 young adults from 5 other churches meaning that 18 young adults are now receiving solid Bible teaching and being equipped to go back to their churches to serve. The response is usually polite but what is clear is that Pastors in this area are tribal. They would rather start their own group than send their members to FUSION. I applaud this! If this ministry causes churches to start their own ministries I celebrate. But, the fact is that the root issue is tribal. Interestingly I have found that the closer a church is to me in theology and doctrine, the less likely they are to endorse this ministry.

Another challenge comes from the young adults themselves. I find that many young adults today do not want to be held accountable. It is very hard to disciple a generation who has such a wide definition of “judging”, and has attached such a negative connotation to it. Don’t get me wrong, I deplore judgmentalism, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about a willingness to open ones-self to biblical assessment and correction by another without taking it as an offense. You’ve probably heard the mantra, “Only God can Judge me!” My response is, “Watch out what you wish for!” The bottom line is that a major impetus for spiritual growth is forming relationships whereby we open ourselves to others to assess the good and bad in our life. Young adults are willing to open up to one another but very hesitant to address areas of sin in each others lives. Young adults are not alone in their aversion to this but since it is young adults we are discussing it is worth noting.

The final challenge is ministering to a generation that wants to celebrate the lowest level of accomplishment. Maybe this isn’t a challenge as much as an observation. This is the generation where everyone who played tee ball got a trophy. Mine is the generation (the last of its kind) that only celebrated winners. Second place was the first loser. Today it seems that young adults want to celebrate and be acknowledged for everything. It’s like the wide receiver in the NFL who jumps up and dances after making a routine catch. I yell at the screen, “That’s your job! Thanks for doing your job now get back in the huddle you moron!” I laugh as I write this and admit that I find myself shaking my head at the level of self-congratulations young adults pass along to themselves and expect to receive from those in authority. Oh well, I’m sure I’ve stirred the pot enough, so I’ll close.

FUSION meets one Saturday a month for fellowship, worship, and a time of Bible teaching.
FUSION also meets once a month for a time of fellowship and fun group activities.
FUSION has also spawned “Thirsty Thursdays” which meets at the local Starbucks, twice a month, for the purpose of making mid-week connections.
Visit our website at www/fusionyaministry.com

NEXT WEEK FUSION WILL MAKE SOME MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENTS ON ALL OF IT’S SOCIAL MEDIA OUTLETS, SO STAY TUNED!!!!!

Young Adult Ministry (part 4): Please Check Your Misconceptions at the Door

2011-05-05T09:59:00.008-04:00

As we steer this series towards home I have to say that it has been great seeing how much conversation it has produced. Several great comments have come in on the young adult blog here and I am humbled by the remarks I received offline along with the reports from my church’s young adults who have shared with me their peers reactions and the conversations that they have had.

So, here’s my pedigree once again. I assisted with a church plant that targeted inner city youth and young adults. I was a youth and young adult Pastor. In my current church the fastest growing demographic is young adults. My point, I have learned some things over the years that have stood true no matter where I have ministered to young adults. Therefore, in this post I wish to clear up some misconceptions that many churches and church leaders have in regard to young adults and faith.

Misconception #1
Young adults are so self-centered that they care very little about God and faith.
It is exactly because they are self-centered that many young adults DO in fact, care about God and faith. When I say that they are self-centered what I mean is that they are on their own, or trying to be. They are attempting to “make it”, to chase dreams and figure out what matters the most in life. Yes they default to self, last time I checked you and I often do as well. But by and large there is still an openness to explore God and faith. The key is that it must be done in a way that is sincere and relevant. Remember, many of them have an aversion to church created by the level of hypocrisy they have seen in many church going folk. The more open and honest you are with them the more they are willing to allow you to guide them on a faith walk. The more you show them how to think through biblical principles, as opposed to spoon feeding them “do’s” and “dont’s”, the more they appreciate God’s Word.

Misconception #2
In the name of relevance they like it dumbed down.
I believe that God’s Word is relevant. I do not need to make it relevant I simply need to show people it’s relevance and timely nature. This is never more true than when ministering to young adults. BUT, this doesn’t mean that I dumb down the Word or my teaching of it. If a young adult has spent any time in church they have already had the Bible relegated to a bunch of stories. What they want now is to dig in! Whether or not they accept it and incorporate it into their lives, young adults want to dig in and explore all that the Bible has to say about life and any particular topic. They want to see it for themselves. They want someone to slog through tough passages with them. They are smart enough to begin formulating real life application.
One of the young adults from my church recently attended a conference. The main speaker of the conference handled one topic throughout several sessions in the span of two days. I thought it would be great to have this young adult be in an environment where the speaker would lead an effort to “dig in” to a subject.
When the young man returned home I asked how things went. His first line, no lie…”I think he dumbed it down for a mass audience.” My jaw dropped. How could you set up an environment for “concentrated” study then deal in terms of generalities and platitudes?
Don’t be afraid to dig in and dissect passages with young adults!

Misconception #3
If you reach out they won’t respond.
If nothing else, have the courage to engage young adults in conversation.
Utilize the techniques of “Active Listening" to better understand them.
I have found that young adults have a lot of opinions and most of them love to share those opinions. If you are open and honest with them, willing to admit your, and the church’s, faults, they will respond and appreciate your efforts.
What they say of church folk is also true of young adults, “They won’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

Young adults, have I come anywhere near hitting the mark?
Let me hear from you!
Do you, or have you ministered to young adults?
I’d like to hear of other misconceptions you have experienced.

Young Adult Ministry (part 3): That Was Then

2011-04-27T16:00:00.003-04:00

We are half way through a series I am doing on ministry to young adults. This series is being offered on both this blog as well as the young adult ministry blog of my church. While online comments have been sparse, this series has sparked quite a bit of conversation offline. This post is a response to many of the questions and comments I have received in person.

To clarify, I am not saying there was “NO” young adult ministry taking place. As I noted in an earlier post, there was a young adult ministry in place at the church I was serving in 2006, but my point was that it was poorly attended. Some churches offered a “College & Career” group, but these groups were often organized by one or two young adults with little guidance provided by the church.

I’d also like to restate that my findings were not “official” research rather information that was gathered first hand through targeted conversations with young adults living in the Baltimore, MD area in the mid 2000’s. As such, they may or may not be indicative of your particular area and this current time.

Speaking of time, there was also a distinct lack of resources for someone, like myself, looking to reach young adults. My first attempt to minister to young adults came when I taught a Bible study out of my home in 1996. In 2004 I assisted a church plant that targeted young adults. Then, in 2006 I determined to forge a path for this type of ministry. I looked around and saw plenty of Christian conferences and resources for Pastors, teens, men, women, and married couples, but very little was available for young adult ministry.

Today men like Ed Stetzer and Thom Rainer have written books like Lost and Found and Essential Church that chronicle young adult research and assist churches in re-capturing those who have left the church. Jason Hayes and Lifeway have developed a great curriculum for young adult ministry called Threads. They also host several conferences that target young adults. Brian Mosley started the Right Now Campaign with the mission of challenging young adults to trade in the “American dream” in order to serve God and spread the gospel. Authors like Renee Johnson, and Kary Oberbrunner have emerged to speak directly to this generation of young adults. This list is not exhaustive but shows that there is a new effort afoot to empower young adult believers.

However, in 1996, 2004, and even in 2006 these people, their ministries, and their resources were not available. I was on my own! The first two posts in this series reflect my journey to understand and minister to young adults during a time when there were scant resources. Upcoming posts will be reflective of what I have found to be true and effective in the current state of young adult ministry.

So come along for the ride and feel free to comment over the next two weeks as we will explore current misconceptions about young adults and I announce a great new resource for young adults and those who minister to them.

Young Adult Ministry (Part 2): Where’d Everybody Go?

2011-04-21T10:46:00.005-04:00

This is part 2 in a series where I'm exploring ministry to young adults. In part 1 I shared some of my personal perceptions of American young adults. You can read that post here. This series is also being highlighted on my church's young adult ministry blog here. Today I will share what I found out when I opened a dialogue with young adults in Maryland. This dialogue took place over the span of almost two years and was conducted with upwards of 100 young adults age 18-30. Many of these young adults grew up regularly attending church. Many of them had not regularly attended church since graduating from high school. In a very informal manner I spoke with them about faith, the church, and their personal walk with God. Ultimately I was trying to find out why so many of them no longer attended church.

In 2006 I was a youth and young adult pastor and could not help but notice that in a church with membership numbers close to a thousand, there were less than a handful of young adults regularly attending church and even less actively participating in the church’s young adult ministry. I set out to find out why and started a series of formal and informal discussions to find out where young adults were.
Here’s what I found out…

1. Many young adults felt that the church did not care about them.
At many churches there was a distinct lack of young adult ministry.
Many of these young adults had grown up in youth group. From age 13 – 18 they had worshiped and grown in an atmosphere specifically catered to them. At age 18 that abruptly ended. Now they were considered adults and were expected to make an unguided transition into “regular” church. No more personal attention, no more age appropriate teaching, and nobody to guide them through the transition. The result was that many of them were left feeling that nobody in the church cared about them.

2. Many young adults felt that the teachings offered by the church did not relate to them and their life circumstances.
As these young adults made the transition into “regular” church they found that their life circumstances did not match those around them. They were not facing midlife crisis, most of them were not raising children, and they certainly weren’t adjusting to retirement.
They acknowledged that pastors mean well, but one size doesn’t always fit all when it comes to sermons. Too many sermons seemed to miss the mark of applying to their life.

3. Many young adults felt that the church was full of hypocrites.
On top of all of this was a powerful undercurrent of distrust. As teenagers many of these young adults had picked up on the hypocrisy prevalent in many churches. They saw parents, and reputed church leaders who acted one way in church but lived another way outside the walls of the church building. Now they were being told that hey needed to join the very group they had disdain for. To them the question was, would they play the game? Would they join the hypocrisy? Would they act spiritual on Sunday knowing that they struggled with sexual purity and a holy lifestyle all week long? Would they attend church on Sunday when they had been out clubbing all night on Saturday? The answer for many was “NO”! They may not be living right, but they would not compound things by acting a certain way in church that was not a proper representation of where they were in their life and walk with God.

4. Some young adults remained connected to their church but still felt that there were almost no opportunities for them to serve in the church.
Then there were the small numbers of young adults who had continued to attend church. It was interesting that this usually occurred when there was a personal contact involved. That is, there was someone in the church who they loved and knew loved them, someone that had invested in their life when they were a teenager. Interestingly, that person was almost never a relative.
However, there was a problem. In most cases these young adults found no place to serve within the church. Most areas of service were occupied by the “adults”, often by people who had been doing the same job for longer than the young adult had been alive. Of course nobody would dare to ask these people to step down, to do such would be an offense.
So here was a small number of young adults, bucking the trend. Often they stood in a gap, still connected with the young adults not in church while being in the church but not connected enough to be actively serving.

Next time I'll share what these young adults believe about God and their personal spiritual journey. But let me hear from you!
Which category have you been in?
What has been your experience?
Are you part of the almost 80% that left church after you graduated from high school or have you stuck it out?
I look forward to hearing from you!

Young Adult Ministry (Part 1): A Personal Perspective

2011-04-18T23:53:00.004-04:00

Over the next few posts I’d like to explore ministry to young adults. Today I will share some of my personal perspective on young adults. In subsequent posts I will delve into such topics as misconceptions of young adults and spirituality.

I find myself compelled to explore this topic because it has been dear to my heart for almost ten years. Also, my church’s young adult ministry is really “taking off” and I am finding more and more of my time being dedicated to it. For this reason I will be posting the series on both my personal blog as well as our young adult ministry blog here.

I define young adults as those aged 18-30ish. While some assume adulthood at the point of marriage, I uphold this definition regardless of marital status. I do so because note that in America young adulthood seems to be elongating. My parents lived in the time when it was quite normal to get married soon after graduating from high school. Along with marriage came a “settling down” and an approach to life that revolved around being responsible, i.e. men got a job and provided for their family while women had children and managed the home.

Twelve years ago I got married at age 25. This was common for my time as most of my contemporaries got married soon after completing an undergraduate college degree. Even those who didn’t go to college often held off until their mid-twenties before getting married. However, upon getting married many of us were in no particular rush to have children as we sought to continue establishing our careers. This was the case for both men and women alike. It wasn’t until we’d reached a certain point in our career or financial standing that many of us had children. To be sure, my wife and I were in the minority by waiting seven years into our marriage, and into our 30’s, before having children. My point is that this delayed adulthood.

Today, it is not uncommon for young adults to not get married until they reach their 30’s with children not coming until mid to late 30”s. Young adulthood now clearly stretches through the twenties regardless of whether one attends college or not. Many young adults jump from job to job, often giving up financial security for the sake of comfort. That is, I often encounter young adults who have left good paying jobs because they didn’t want to live within the confines the job required or because they would rather pursue something they consider more fulfilling. Often they fall back on the safety net of their parents, moving back home as they prepare for whatever will come next. As I’ve stated, it’s not uncommon for this pattern to continue into the early 30’s. Even those who stay with their good paying jobs find no rush to get married, I have some thoughts on why that is which I may or may not discuss later. Along with the delay to marry is a delay to pick up the mantle of “responsible adult”. Instead, they choose to enjoy what I call a more sophisticated college lifestyle. You know, still plenty of drinking, video gaming, exploring musical interests (read being in a local band).

All of this to say that young adulthood today often stretches into the 30’s. Even those who get married in their twenties still don’t think in terms of classic responsible adulthood until they get into their thirties.

It is to this generation and mindset that I have sought to minister. Knowing that amid the stress and pressures presented to this group, God is able to do a powerful work. It was in my young adult years that God grabbed a hold of my life and steered it in a direction that many, including myself, never would have guessed. Can he do the same for others? Young adult, can he do the same for you? Or maybe the better question is, will you allow Him to? What does God have to offer you? What do you have to offer God?

I welcome your comments and hope you will follow this series.

Being the Church

2010-12-29T10:40:00.003-05:00

I often talk about how we need to "be" the church and "live" church, not merely "go" to church.
This video explains in simple fashion what I am talking about.

Best 0f 2009

2010-12-16T16:59:00.002-05:00

The holiday season also means the "Best of" season.
I was looking back at my "Best of 2009" post and found it amusing so I decided to re-post it.
Look for my "Best of 2010" post some time in the next few weeks.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

I have spent most of the day reviewing some of the funniest videos on the web with my cousin. As a result I have decided to post my own "best of".
Since I post across several platforms anything that follows is something I posted this year on either this blog, my twitter or Facebook page.

Scripture Verse that has had the greatest impact on me this year.
It was not one verse but one chapter...1 Corinthians 12.
Here's some of the highlights...
"Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good...The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ...Now the body is not made up of one part but of many. If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be...The eye cannot say to the hand, "I don't need you!" And the head cannot say to the feet, "I don't need you!" On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it..."

Best Original Quote
"You can't pass on a legacy of faith when you only exercise your faith for an hour each Sunday morning."

Best Re-quote
"A word to the wise ain't necessary -- it's the stupid ones that need the advice." by Bill Cosby (@BillCosby)

Best Observation
"Elijah went before the people and said, How long will you waver between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow him" (1 Kings 18:21)
My observation = Unfortunately their response was much like today..."But the people said nothing." (1 Kings 18:21)...too many are only "Christian" in name!

Best response to one of my quotes.
Quote = "What if people actually encountered God when they show up to church?"
Response = "What if church wasn't a distraction keeping people from encountering God?" by Rob Kirby

Best Pic
Even though this isn't the best pic of my family, it was my favorite trip to Florida this past year. It was Jorden's first trip to Disney World and on this particular day we were at Animal Kingdom with our awesome friends and got rained on for a bit.

Best Original Video Post
"Family Dance"

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Best Downloaded Video
"Throw it on the Ground"

Best Superbowl Commercial
"Flex the Golden Pipes"

And of course the best team would be the six-time Superbowl Champion Pittsburgh Steelers!!!

I praise God for another year to serve Him!
Keep following me as I follow God!

Hello...is this thing on? OR Guess Who's Back?

2010-09-07T13:18:00.009-04:00

Well, the Summer has flown by and as usual I didn't get most of what I wanted done.
Looking back at my previous post I see that I earmarked 3 overriding goals for the Summer. The bad news is that I didn't get them all done. The good news is that God was doing many other wonderful things.

To review...
I did enjoy fellowship with God, however, it was not in quiet contemplative times of meditation and prayer rather it was in the midst of chaos that I found his "still quiet" voice.

As for my goal to read more, I started very well and got through some great books early in the Summer. At some point later I will do a post about the book "Exponential" by Dave Ferguson. It definitely has had a deep impact on me. As the Summer got busier I found myself depleted of the time and energy needed to keep up the frenetic reading pace I had begun.

As for my book writing project, it never got off the ground.

So what did I do this Summer?
I received a call from a group asking if our church had any outreach ideas that needed funding. I informed them that we have wanted to do a VBS and Block Party but haven't had the funding or a building to do so. They said that if we found the building they'd provide the funds. In the span of three weeks God provided a building with great outdoor grounds, local retailers willing to donate food and various items, unsaved volunteers, mobilized our church to action, and "made it happen"! Rick Warren used to say, "God creates waves, we just need to recognize them and ride them." That is exactly what our church witnessed.
When most churches have a VBS they have the children in their church come out and ask them to invite their friends. We have one child in our church, my five year old daughter. This meant that we were asking people in our community to send their children out to attend a VBS put on by a new church of 20 people who don't have a building. 12 kids came out, and 4 of the 6 families represented by those children are unchurched. In other words, God has opened an awesome door to minister to these families from our community. For 4 nights I transformed myself into "Uncle B" and presented lessons from Genesis 1-3 under the theme "God Made You & God Loves You". Then, at the end of the week we celebrated with a Block Party for the community. Just over 60 people came out and in that group were more unchurched families.

We also had our second baptismal service this Summer. What made this special was that it was highlighted by reconciliation between our church and another conservative Baptist church in our community. Since before our church started I have prayed and done everything on my end to bring reconciliation between that Pastor, myself and our two churches. I have always had the conviction that if we say we believe the same thing we ought to be able to partner in ministry. After years of prayer I received a letter from the Pastor of that church seeking forgiveness and reconciliation. He then offered his church facility for us to utilize for our baptism.
We had two men get baptized. Both of them had unsaved extended family attend. One of them, a young man, also had almost a dozen unsaved friends attend. Also, members of the hosting church attended. The gospel was clearly shown and presented and God was glorified.

Finally, I was invited to speak at a Christian camp outside of Binghamton, NY. I brought my family with me and spoke to Jr High youth 3 times a day for a week. It was an awesome privilege to lead young people to the Lord, to see young people re-dedicate themselves to God, and to interact with counselors who are young adults.

Well, that was the "Big Stuff". There was more which will be in future posts, but for now the big question is, "Where do I go from here?" I'm trying to decide if I want to change, or tweak, the previous format. I'm going to take the rest of the week to consider this a bit more and then officially start posting again next Monday.
SO, thanks for following and Lord willing we'll meet again on Monday.

ps
Some of you asked what happened to the "follow" link.
I have put it back on the page.
For those that don't know what I'm talking about, one of the links on the right side of the page lists those who follow this blog and allows you to sign up to follow this blog. By signing up to follow the blog you will automatically receive an email every time I post. How cool is that? No more checking the site to see if I have posted, you will be notified automatically. I encourage you to utilize this feature!

Summer Sabbatical

2010-06-25T10:53:00.001-04:00

This will be my last regular post for a few weeks. I have decided to take a break from daily blogging during the months of July and August. At my church we use these months to pare back ministries, rest, and hear from God. I’ve decided that this will be one of the ministries I pare back on. I may post from time to time but I will not do so on a fixed schedule. I invite you to continue following me on Twitter as I will continue to tweet on a regular basis.

I have truly enjoyed the interaction my posts have generated, most offline, and I look forward to reviving these and many other discussions in the Fall. In the meantime I plan to focus on three areas.

1. Fellowship with God.
I am looking forward to extended times of prayer, meditation and Bible Study. I have been asking God to renew my passion in my relationship with Him. In order to prioritize this I am clearing a lot of my schedule. Less “doing” more “being”.
2. Reading
For me, one of the joys of summer used to be reading. It started as a child and even as an adult I would compile a stack a of 10-12 books that I intended to work through during the Summer months. I haven’t done this in at least 4 years and I plan to get back to it this summer. In fact, I plan to fast from TV in the evenings in order to devote time to reading. I also want to read a diverse selection. Fiction, non-fiction, secular and Christian authors, classics, I’m open to them all and invite your suggestions.
3. Writing
For some time I have wanted to write a book. Knowing myself I’ve been very selective about what I will write. In the past I have started projects then lost passion and never completed them. Recently, God has used some personal trials to shed light on a subject that I would like to write about. Since it is very personal and will be a ministry in my own life, I know I will remain passionate about the project. It will also require some research and interviews which is what I am hoping to work on over the next two months.

Well, you know what I’ll be doing this summer, how about you? What are your plans?

When the Church Prays (part 2)

2010-06-24T09:01:00.004-04:00

Romans 12:26-27
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.

Matthew 6:5
And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full.

I think that one of the biggest hindrances to corporate prayer is the fact that it is public prayer. On one end of the spectrum are those who are afraid to talk to God in an open setting. On the other end of the spectrum are those who make a spectacle of their time.
I believe the above verses help address both situations.
For those who are afraid, remember, prayer is communicating with God. The fact is, He doesn’t care about our words as much as He cares about our heart. Romans 12:26-27 helps us see this. God has given us the Holy Spirit and one of his ministries is to take the message of our heart and communicate it to God. Often we don’t know what to say, whether praying in private or in public. Other times we don’t comprehend what we are really asking God. In both cases the holy Spirit works on our behalf to align us, our heart, and our desires with God. With this in mind we can confidently approach God with our prayers irregardless of what they may sound like. We don’t need flowery speeches we just need a sincere heart. There is no need to be intimidated because we think others may sound better when they pray. Simply talk to God and let the Spirit do the rest.

Now, for those who put on a production. Only God can discern motives so I will simply say that Matt 6:5 is a reminder that in an abundance of words there may be a serious lack of substance. Only God knows…or better yet, thank God He knows.

What do you think churches can do to involve more of their people in corporate prayer?
Feel free to comment.

Foundational Lessons For Parents

2010-06-22T09:31:00.003-04:00

This past Sunday, Father's Day, I spoke from the book of Proverbs and presented 10 Foundational Lessons that parents should teach their children.
You can listen to that message here.

I believe that Proverbs teaches that parents (Particularly fathers as the representative head of the home) primary duty is to teach holy living to their children. This is accomplished by living as an example and by teaching wisdom. John MacArthur has identified 10 crucial lessons contained within the first nine chapters of proverbs and I have adapted them. They are...

1. Fear God (1:7)
2. Guard Your Mind (4:23)
3. Obey Your Parents (1:8)
4. Choose Friends Wisely (1:10, 18:24)
5. Control Your Body (5:1-11)
6. Have a Healthy View of Sex (5:15-21)
7. Watch Your Words (4:24)
8. Work Hard (6:6)
9. Manage Your Money (3:9, 6:1)
10. Love Your Neighbor (3:27-30)

There is much that can be said in regards to spending time with your children, listening to them, cultivating their interests, and the like, but in the end God's desire is for us to raise children that love and serve him. Therefore I marks these 10 lessons as the foundations from which all the rest can be built on.

What do you think?
Feel free to comment.

Monday is for Marriage - Hard Work?

2010-06-21T10:05:00.007-04:00

Marriage is not easy. Unfortunately the world consistently tells us that hard work and selflessness are the marks of a bad marriage. The thought is that it should be easy or there is something wrong. One of my favorite quotes that exemplifies this is by Donald Trump.

"I wish I`d had a great marriage. See, my father was always very proud of me, but the one thing he got right was that he had a great marriage. He was married for 64 years. One of my ex-wives once said to me, `You have to work at a marriage`. And I said, `That`s the most ridiculous thing`, because my parents, they didn`t work at the marriage. If you have to work at a marriage, it`s not going to work. It has to be sort of a natural thing. But my ex-wife would say, `You have to work at this, you have to do this, you have to do that`. And I`m saying to myself, `Man, I work all day long, well into the evening. I don`t want to come home and work at a marriage. A marriage has to be very easy`. My father would come home, have dinner, and take it easy. It was the most natural marriage I`ve ever seen."

I don't even know where to begin dissecting the fallacies in this statement! What is clear is that Donald wants his marriage to be easy for HIM!

To be honest, that's how we all are. When we say marriage is hard work we are really saying that some of the requirements it places on me personally are not things that I would naturally want to do. It's an issue of selfishness and marriage, by it's very nature, is designed to kill selfishness, or is it?

The better question is, "Was it?" I believe the Bible teaches that Adam and Eve were created equal and given roles that would provide the perfect compliment to each other. Then sin entered. With sin came the the big "I". In other words, the system isn't broken but my desire to fulfill it sure is. I don't really care about complimenting anyone, I just want what I want and I want it now! Honestly, this is how most of us enter marriage. We talk about what the other person does for or to us. We never talk about how we plan to serve them for the rest of our lives.

Sin makes marriage hard work. Sin makes me not want to reach out to understand and serve my spouse. Sin makes me think that my way is the only way things ought to be. Understand that the hard work of marriage is really the hard work of killing sin. Thankfully, when we place our faith in Christ he frees us from the power of sin. The question is, will we choose to walk in that victory each day or will we will default to selfishness.

Below I have copied a statement of belief by the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood I'll bet you didn't know there was such a group? Their website and ministry is a great help to the church. I have added their content so that we can be sure that we have a sure foundation when discussing marriage and family issues.

Based on our understanding of Biblical teachings, we affirm the following:
1. Both Adam and Eve were created in God's image, equal before God as persons and distinct in their manhood and womanhood (Gen 1:26-27, 2:18).

2. Distinctions in masculine and feminine roles are ordained by God as part of the created order, and should find an echo in every human heart (Gen 2:18, 21-24; 1 Cor 11:7-9; 1 Tim 2:12-14).

3. Adam's headship in marriage was established by God before the Fall, and was not a result of sin (Gen 2:16-18, 21-24, 3:1-13; 1 Cor 11:7-9).

4. The Fall introduced distortions into the relationships between men and women (Gen 3:1-7, 12, 16).
* In the home, the husband's loving, humble headship tends to be replaced by domination or passivity; the wife's intelligent, willing submission tends to be replaced by usurpation or servility.
* In the church, sin inclines men toward a worldly love of power or an abdication of spiritual responsibility, and inclines women to resist limitations on their roles or to neglect the use of their gifts in appropriate ministries.

5. The Old Testament, as well as the New Testament, manifests the equally high value and dignity which God attached to the roles of both men and women (Gen 1:26-27, 2:18; Gal 3:28). Both Old and New Testaments also affirm the principle of male headship in the family and in the covenant community (Gen 2:18; Eph 5:21-33; Col 3:18-19; 1 Tim 2:11-15).

6. Redemption in Christ aims at removing the distortions introduced by the curse.
* In the family, husbands should forsake harsh or selfish leadership and grow in love and care for their wives; wives should forsake resistance to their husbands' authority and grow in willing, joyful submission to their husbands' leadership (Eph 5:21-33; Col 3:18-19; Tit 2:3-5; 1 Pet 3:1-7).
* In the church, redemption in Christ gives men and women an equal share in the blessings of salvation; nevertheless, some governing and teaching roles within the church are restricted to men (Gal 3:28; 1 Cor 11:2-16; 1 Tim 2:11-15).

7. In all of life Christ is the supreme authority and guide for men and women, so that no earthly submission-domestic, religious, or civil-ever implies a mandate to follow a human authority into sin (Dan 3:10-18; Acts 4:19-20, 5:27-29; 1 Pet 3:1-2).

8. In both men and women a heartfelt sense of call to ministry should never be used to set aside Biblical criteria for particular ministries (1 Tim 2:11-15, 3:1-13; Tit 1:5-9). Rather, Biblical teaching should remain the authority for testing our subjective discernment of God's will.

9. With half the world's population outside the reach of indigenous evangelism; with countless other lost people in those societies that have heard the gospel; with the stresses and miseries of sickness, malnutrition, homelessness, illiteracy, ignorance, aging, addiction, crime, incarceration, neuroses, and loneliness, no man or woman who feels a passion from God to make His grace known in word and deed need ever live without a fulfilling ministry for the glory of Christ and the good of this fallen world (1 Cor 12:7-21).

10. We are convinced that a denial or neglect of these principles will lead to increasingly destructive consequences in our families, our churches, and the culture at large.

Feel free to comment.
How does sin affect not only your marriage but all of your relationships?

Friday is for Friends & Family - Barry Brown

2010-06-18T09:57:00.007-04:00

I had the privilege of hanging out with my good friend Barry Brown the past few days. Barry is available to speak to youth or parents about family ministry through Divine Perspectives.
Barry and I traveled to Orlando to attend the Southern Baptist Convention's annual meeting.

Upon arrival at the hotel I shared with him how the Divine Perspectives ministry is progressing. I shared how exciting it is to see this blog grow. I shared how many new contacts I've made through twitter. I shared that attending the Exponential conference in Orlando in April had produced many new connections and great exposure for DP. I shared how a new focus combined with the various social media platforms has driven web traffic.
Then I laughed and told him that despite all of this, people are not booking speakers through Divine Perspectives. I shared that all of my personal speaking engagements have come though my traditional connections and nobody, including myself, has yet to be booked through DP.

Barry's response is the reason I value his friendship. Without hesitation he shrugged his shoulders and said, "It's not its season yet", then continued unpacking his bag.

Concise, to the point, straightforward, and completely nonchalant. That's Barry! I knew that Barry was right. I knew the truth of what he said before he even said it. I just wasn't ready to come to terms with it.

Proverbs 16:9 says,
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps."

Barry's words were a powerful reminder that despite the power of vision and long term goals, each day it is God who determines the next step. Have no doubt that God provides vision, just remember that he doesn't fast forward you to the fulfillment of that vision, he brings you one step at a time.

When the Church Prays

2010-06-16T21:37:00.005-04:00

Acts 12:1-19

If you are like me you have heard a lot of sermons on this passage.
Most of those sermons deal with the unbelief of those who prayed.
I have been re-examining this passage for a while and have seen so many other things happening, not the least of which is the power of corporate prayer.
Look at verses 1-5.

1.It was about this time that King Herod arrested some who belonged to the church, intending to persecute them.
2.He had James, the brother of John, put to death with the sword.
3.When he saw that this pleased the Jews, he proceeded to seize Peter also. This happened during the Feast of Unleavened Bread.
4.After arresting him, he put him in prison, handing him over to be guarded by four squads of four soldiers each. Herod intended to bring him out for public trial after the Passover.
5.So Peter was kept in prison, but the church was earnestly praying to God for him.

Herod thought he was in control but note how verse 5 says otherwise. The church was praying and God, in his sovereignty, was using their prayer to override Herod and enact his own plan.
In the verses that follow we see that God's plan triumphed over Herod's and, while the church was surprised at God's answer, you can't escape how important prayer was to the early church.

Here's some other examples.
Acts 1:14 - As they wait for the Holy Spirit they prayed.
Acts 2:42 - The summary statement of the early church's ministry includes prayer.
Acts 3:1 - The Apostles continued to observe regular times of scheduled prayer.
Acts 4:24 - When they met opposition they prayed.
Acts 6:4 - The leaders saw prayer as an important part of their responsibility.
Acts 10:5&9 - Prayer was the major vehicle that brought Peter and Cornelius together.

Clearly, prayer was important in the development of the early church. Is this still true today or are we too busy planning and programing?

What really stands out to me in the original passage is the fact that it was corporate prayer that God used. I believe the church will see God do amazing things when we value corporate prayer like the early church did.

What do you think?
Do you really value praying with the people of God?

Proclaiming the Year of the Lord's favor!

2010-06-14T23:50:00.007-04:00

The church I pastor, Lighthouse Community Church, has what we refer to as a Ministry Year. Each year on the Sunday after Labor Day I announce our theme for the upcoming year. From September until the end of June our ministries will be in full operation and will be unified by that year’s theme.

In September of 2009 I announced the theme “Proclaiming the year of the Lord’s Favor”. You can listen to that sermon here. In that sermon I stressed that we live in a time of God’s favor (Grace) as opposed to his judgment. As such we who are his follower’s ought to be as urgent in declaring the good news as Jesus was.

This ministry year has been one where we have focused on being a disciple making station. We have covered everything from sharing the gospel to identifying and reaching various people groups. We have prayer walked our community and taken up the mantle of servant evangelism. We have become disciples and committed to reproducing disciples.

Two Sundays from now we will celebrate what God has done in our presence. We will rejoice in the ways he has used us. We will recommit to making this a way of life and foundational to the way our church operates.

I light of what has been a powerful year I present 10 quotes that have continued to fuel my fire to be a living mouthpiece for God.

“I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some.” – Apostle Paul

“For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.” – Apostle Paul

“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." - Jesus

“Every Christian is either a missionary or an impostor” – Charles Spurgeon

“You can’t plan a revival you can only prepare for one” – unknown

“To engage people in culture we must remember that holiness is separation from sin, not from sinners.” – Ed Stetzer

“Lost people are not the enemy they are prisoners of war” – Ed Stetzer

“Too many people are tripping on the stumbling block of the church before they get to the stumbling block of the gospel.” – Ed Stetzer

“I believe God has me here to stand at the gates of hell and re-direct traffic” – unknown

“I’m not afraid of failing as much as I am afraid of being successful at that which doesn’t matter” – unknown

What are some quotes that drive you?

Monday is for Marriage (Prep) - Sex

2010-06-14T08:44:00.003-04:00

In the final part of my series on marriage prep I want to talk about sex.
Before doing so, I have to say that this has been a fun series. While the four subjects I’ve discussed are not the only things I talk about in premarital counseling, they are the subjects that couples are commonly struggling with when I do my first year check-up with them.
I hope this series has been helpful to both those considering marriage and those already married.

The world will tell you that the way to prepare for sex in marriage is to have sex before marriage. Experiment, they say, after all if you can’t make it work in the bedroom what chance do you have of making it work in the other areas of your relationship. Is it any surprise that the world has it 100% back wards?

The Bible makes it clear that from the beginning sex was to be the final piece of completing intimacy not the first (Genesis 2:18-25). What is sad is that so many Christian teens and young adults follow the world’s cues in this area. What is even sadder is that so many Christian teens and young adults don’t have a healthy biblical view of sex. Many are simply told to abstain from sex with no further dialogue on God’s design and purposes for sex. Another classic case of the church promoting “don’t” without teaching the “do”.

So, let’s clarify with the 3 “P”’s.
Procreation (Gen 1:28, Ps 127:3-5, Deut 11:18-19, Prov 1:8)
God designed sex for reproduction. However, reproduction itself is not the end goal, rather reproduction of a godly line. Let’s be clear about this, there is no command to have children (Adam and Eve were told to multiply but there is no such explicit command to us), but we are instructed that children are a gift from God and ought to be raised to love and serve God.

Pleasure (Prov 5:18-19, Song of Solomon)
Sex is intended for pleasure and enjoyment. It has been said that God is the author of sexual pleasure, not the censor. What the world tells us is sexual freedom is in fact sinful bondage.

Protection (1 Corinthians 7:2-5)
Sex is intended to protect husbands and wives from temptation. Sex within the confines of marriage is a safety zone for the fullest expression of intimacy and enjoyment. Furthermore, each spouse is responsible for the sexual fulfillment of the other. Again, the world is 100% opposite the Bible when they say that you need to find your own sexual fulfillment.

So there it is. If your girlfriend/boyfriend is pressuring you to have sex you should question their commitment to God and his Word and this should be a red flag!

A final word to young women.
Please understand how important it is for you to have a healthy view of sex as you head into marriage. It’s normal to be nervous but that’s not what I’m talking about. Too many Christian women head into marriage thinking that sex is only for procreation. It’s the old school view that it’s a dirty job but at some point you have to do it. Understand the best thing you can do for your mate is remain pure AND THEN enjoy discovering true physical intimacy together. The more initiative you take the more you will drive your man crazy.

A final word to young men.
First, understand that if you currently lose the battle against pornography getting married won’t cure you. One of the most over distorted verses is 1 Corinthians 7:8-9. Marriage offers a safe place to have your sexual needs fulfilled but it does not cure sin! You WILL carry all of your mental pornographic baggage into your marriage along with false expectations of what sex should be like. Then, when you get rejected (headaches happen) you will turn back to the pornography creating further damage. Deal with your sin now! Get accountability, which may include sharing your struggle with your fiancé at some point, and commit to eliminating this sin and seeking purity.
Second, realize that while you have been dating to marry, you need to marry to date. By this I mean that when you say “I do” it is not the end of romance. Women are gentle and need a lot of romance. They don’t walk around thinking about sex like you. They need to be warmed up. If you begin your marriage by starting a pattern whereby you make it clear that all you are interested in is 3 minutes of “happy time”, your wife will catch on quick and begin to shut down. For her sex will truly become a “duty” not an intimate expression of oneness. Every day you must say “I do” to her all over again by showing her how special she is and letting her know that she is your #1 choice, even if you don’t get to have sex at the end of the day.

Well, that ends this series!
Do you still think you have what it takes?
I hope this has been helpful and I look forward to hearing from you.

What About Me?

2010-06-11T10:04:00.002-04:00

For almost a year I led a discipleship group.
We studied the Bible held, one another accountable, and attempted to spur one another to spiritual growth.
Then the two young men I was discipling decided they'd had enough.

Since the "break up" I have had several different emotions but frustration has been the dominant one. The other night I was once again pouring out my frustration to God. Knowing that it is the Holy Spirit that produces spiritual hunger I poured out my heart asking God to ignite the fire in these young men. Then God did what he is so apt to do, he put a mirror up to my own life. The haunting question was this.

"Do I desire God as much as I am praying that they will?"

The fact is I often have a take it or leave it relationship with God. By that I mean that my yearning for God is less consistent and more like a roller coaster. Like, "now I want him" then, "now I'm content to simply be busy about his work without regard to my walk with him".
As a pastor it's really easy for people to think that I'm sold out for God all the time. It's really easy to seem spiritual when my job is to be doing "God's work". I visit people and pray with them, I teach and preach Bible lessons, surely I am "sold out for God", right...right?

I want these young men to see that giving God full reign in your life brings joy and freedom. And God wants me to consistently live what I just said irregardless of my vocation.

Being the Answer to your own Prayers.

2010-06-10T09:43:00.007-04:00

"When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field." (Matt 9:36-38)

Jesus spent a lot of time focusing his disciples on God's agenda. I call this a divine perspective. As an under shepherd of God's flock I am always asking God to give me a clear "divine perspective" on everything. I am always asking him to "Open MY eyes!"

In the above passage, Jesus' directs the disciples to pray. I wonder how many of them actually prayed and how many of them said, "Yeah Jesus, I'll pray about that" then went about their business? It would seem that the answer to my question is that Jesus would not allow them to do this. In the very next verses he commissions them to go out and begin harvesting.

"He called his twelve disciples to him and gave them authority..." (Matt 10:1)

It seems that at least one of the reasons he told them to pray was that they would consider whether they might be the answer to the prayer. How often do we see that? How often do we pray for something or someone without seeing that God wants us to be the answer to our prayers?

James put it another way,
"Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it?" (James 2:15-16)

It's much more convenient to pray for our brothers and sisters in need then to act on their behalf. It's much easier to pray that God will remove a trial than it is to see what he wants you to do in the midst of it.

On a more personal note, I am the pastor of a one year old church plant. When I share the vision and work of Lighthouse Community Church with others I always inform them that there are three ways that they can partner with us. (1)Prayer (2)Presence (3)Financially You can guess the most popular option. Understand we need and covet prayers, I'm just wondering out loud if any of our prayer partners have ever thought of being the answer to their prayers for us?

How about you?
Do you find yourself giving people the "prayer blow off"?
Do you tell people you'll pray for them then not do it?
Do you tell people you'll pray for them without considering how you can be an answer to that prayer?
I'd love to hear your comments.

Two for Tuesday - Who will you follow?

2010-06-08T10:10:00.005-04:00

I if asked you to follow someone who hates you, wants to destroy you, and whatever he leads you to do will bring pain would you follow?
Yet people, even Christians, follow Satan and sin all the time.
I find it interesting that the people who declare the loudest that Christianity is too restrictive are the people who are in the most bondage. They are slaves to sin and refuse to acknowledge it.

I briefly explored this in my sermon this Sunday, you can listen here.

To put it a little more succinctly I offer two lists today.

Following Satan is following someone who...
1. Hates you
2. Wants to destroy you
3. Leads you to do things that will harm you
4. Leads you to do things that only advance his position
5. Is the "Father of Lies"
6. Is the "Enemy of your soul"
7. Condemns and accuses you after you do what he wants you to do.
8. WILL NEVER EVER LEAD YOU TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT!

Following Christ is following someone who...
1. Loves you
2. Died for you
3. Seeks to lead you in righteousness
4. Shapes and molds you to be more like him
5. Uses pinpoint accuracy to focus on areas of development
6. Forgives when you fail
7. Picks you up when you stumble
8. TOOK THE PENALTY FOR YOUR SIN AND LIVES TO BRING YOU NEW LIFE!

Monday is for Marriage (prep) - Conflict Resolution

2010-06-07T11:19:00.008-04:00

After a week off to observe Memorial Day, today we look at part 3 of 4 in our series on marriage preparation.

How do you handle conflict? How do you resolve conflict? You and your girlfriend/boyfriend need to begin developing solid practices in this area before you get married. I can hear you now, "But we don't fight?" YOU WILL!! The fact that you don't fight now actually makes things worse. It may mean you are not properly evaluating each others strengths and weaknesses. It may mean that one of you is continually giving in to the other. Chances are one of you tries to avoid conflict at all costs. None of this is going to produce a solid marriage.

I'd like to begin by dealing with the issue of anger. There is a direct correlation between anger management, communication, and conflict resolution. How do you handle anger?

Anger is not sin but unchecked anger opens the door to sin (Eph 4:26, James 1:19-20, Prov 29:22). A great example of this is Cain. Look at God's words to him in Genesis 4:6-7.

6. Then the LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? 7. If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it."

There it is in a nutshell. Unchecked anger is the doorway to sin.
Now, note what God does. He questions Cain. He doesn't go to him and tell him what to do, he asks him questions. "Why are you angry?" Doesn't God know the answer to that question? Of course he does. Why does he ask questions that he already knows the answer to? This is a wonderful thing about God that we see all throughout scripture. God will often ask people the same questions they should be asking themselves. Think about it, "Adam and Eve, why are you hiding?" "Cain, why are you angry?" "Elijah, what are you doing out here in the desert?"
Here's my point, God created emotions. We are emotional beings just like our creator, some more so than others. I get scared when "holy" church folk start telling me to ignore my emotions! Seeing God ask these questions teaches us that God wants us to process our emotions! In that respect I often say, "Anger is like the check engine light in your car. When it comes on you can keep driving but at some point you better get to the bottom of why it's on"
So here's some suggestions on handling anger drawn from Gary Chapman's fine work, "The Other Side of Love"

1. Consciously acknowledge to yourself that you are angry.
It does you no good to ignore the obvious. You feel that an injustice has occurred. You have been wronged, allow yourself to acknowledge your emotions.

2. Restrain your immediate response.
This is not a time to "go with the flow". That was the essence of God's warning to Cain. Going with the flow of anger means riding the river rapids of sin. The chances are great that your initial response will be negative and destructive. For those with a "fiery" temper this is not easy but you can train yourself to step back, literally take deep breaths, and take a "time out". See, time outs aren't just for children.

3. Locate the focus of your anger
This is very important for conflict resolution because you need to address the problem NOT attack the person! If you haven't narrowed down the real problem how can you address it. Why are you angry? Is it what this person has done, or said, or just the way they have done it? Is my anger influenced by something else, maybe from work or childhood? The bottom line is that doing this analysis helps you grasp whether someone has truly sinned against you or has just not met an expectation. (Remember those pesky expectations from part 1 of this series)

4. Analyze your options
What can and should you do? Well, whatever you do should come under one of the following principles. Either lovingly confront the person or decide to let it go. We'll deal with loving confrontation in a moment but let me clarify the Christian concept of letting it go. Letting go means that you are deciding that love covers a multitude of sins(Prov 10:12, 17:9, 1 Peter4:8). More importantly, by doing this you are giving the matter over to God. You are actively saying, "God I will not seek revenge or hold this against this person." Romans 12:17-21 shows us this.
17. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. 18. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. 20. On the contrary, "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." 21. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

5. Take action
Whatever direction you decide to go, do it.
If loving confrontation is in order consider Matt 18:15-17 and Gal 6:1-5. In our current context of conflict resolution here are some tips.

1. Acknowledge your anger to the offending person in a peaceful manner.
Refrain from explosive and/or verbal attacks. If you can't then don't start the discussion until you can.
2. Refrain from hyperbole and focus on the issue. (Don't attack the person)
Don't say, "You always...", instead say, "When you...it makes me feel(or, "it is wrong")...can you do...instead?"
3. Listen
Remember James 1:19-20. Use your active listening to understand the other person's perspective. This doesn't mean that you overlook sinful behavior but you allow them to respond and you seek to understand their perspective. Maybe something you did precipitated the wrong action. However, a wrong action is a wrong action. As your mom always said, two wrongs don't make a right. The point is for both parties to see their wrongs, acknowledge them, and ask for forgiveness.

And what if they don't respond properly? It's on them! You have done your best before God to resolve the issue. God will help you control your anger if and when it happens again, but, keep in mind you are using this to assess whether or not you and your girlfriend/boyfriend are ready for marriage.

Unresolved issues prior to marriage become unresolved issues in marriage and become fuel for divorce!

What do you think?
Feel free to comment or add to this post.

Friday is for Friends & Family - An Infestation of Biblical Proportions

2010-06-04T10:51:00.005-04:00

"1 Then the LORD said to Moses, "Go to Pharaoh and say to him, 'This is what the LORD says: Let my people go, so that they may worship me. 2 If you refuse to let them go, I will plague your whole country with frogs. 3 The Nile will teem with frogs. They will come up into your palace and your bedroom and onto your bed, into the houses of your officials and on your people, and into your ovens and kneading troughs. 4 The frogs will go up on you and your people and all your officials.'" (Exodus 8:1-4)

Last week I shared that my four year old daughter would be performing in her first dance recital. She is the sixth dancer to enter the stage.
Enjoy!

Ask For The Business!

2010-06-03T11:35:00.004-04:00

When I worked in sales for the Marriott hotel company my boss continually hammered one line into my head. “Ask for the business?” Let me explain, I worked in proactive direct sale.
“Proactive” meant that I had to go find business. I was not afforded the opportunity to sit back and answer incoming calls. I needed to fill my hotel with people staying for 5 nights or longer and the most effective way to do so was to go find them and bring them in.
“Direct” meant that it was my job to locate all decisions makers and cultivate a person to person relationship with them whereby they knew they could trust me to deliver the service they needed.
All this was to be done the “Marriott Way”. Anyone who has worked for the company knows that there is a Marriott Way to do everything. They are the sultans of procedure.
As such, I immersed myself in training and quickly became an expert not only in their approach but also as a leader initiating new “best practices”.

All of this to say that there was an in-depth process that went into securing each account. However, no account was ever secured without asking for the business. Visits, lunches, tours, building rapport was all useless if, at some point, I didn’t ask them for their business. By the way, it was always the hardest thing to do. Amazing isn’t it. You invest time, energy and money over the span of weeks, even months, but you never ask this person to buy your product. Believe me it happened a lot. Many of my sales cohorts lost business because they never asked for it. I was blessed to have a boss that always asked me when and how I planned to ask for the business.

By now you are asking, what’s your point?

Here it is. How often do we forget to ask unbelievers for their business? How often do we work up the nerve to share the gospel or share our testimony with an unbeliever only to finish and leave everything hanging in the air dissipating like a vapor. Here we sit, shocked by the words that have come out of our own mouth, awaiting the BIG REJECTION that we are sure is about to come from our listener. As the moment passes everybody waits for the awkward pause to end thinking, can we get back to sports, the weather, or something else?

In these moments I want to encourage you to remember to invite your listener to partake of all that God has for them. No, you’re not asking for their business, you are simply inviting them to respond to the truth you have just revealed to them. You are asking them to respond to the work God is doing in them. After all, you do believe God is at work don’t you? According to Romans 1:16, you’ve just released some power. Check it out…
“I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes”
Assuming that you’ve made it all this way without your listener running away or attacking you, why not try to close the deal?

Here’s some great follow-up questions?
“Does that make sense to you?”
“Do you get what I’m saying?”

And then ask for the business!
“How about you, do you think you’d like to place your faith in Christ?”
“Do you ever feel like you could use a little bit of that in your life? How about accepting Christ as your savior?”
“What’s holding you back? We can do this right now”

To be sure, we are not about manipulation. But, don't leave them hanging out there without inviting them to partake in what you have shared.

What do you think?
Feel free to comment.

Two for Tuesday - The Devil Made Me Do It!

2010-06-01T10:42:00.007-04:00

Have you ever examined the reasons why you sin?
I know, we still have a sin nature etc.
What I'm saying is, have you ever looked past the justifications we use at the time of temptation and really examined why you have committed a particular sin?

Upon examining some of my sins throughout the years I have come up with the following list.

1. Brings temporary pleasure
2. I want what I want when I want it
3. Lack of self control
4. I have allowed a "stronghold" to be built
5. Ignorant that it was sin
6. I don't believe God's way is best
7. Feel powerless to resist
8. Blindsided by it
9. Went along with "the crowd"
10. Led by overwhelming emotions

1 John 2:16 summarizes the lure of the world into three categories.
The desires of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and pride.
James 1:14 reminds us how powerful our desires are within us.
HALLELUJAH, Romans 6 reminds us of the path to victory.

I have been preaching a series on change and we have been in the book of Romans 6 for the past two weeks. I encourage you to listen to these sermons entitled "Free to Choose" and "Make the Choice".
The fact is we are not powerless against sin. As believers we are actually dead to it. These sermons will show you how to live out the reality of this powerful truth and experience real change in your life.

Why do you sin?
Feel free to comment!

Monday is for Memorial Day

2010-05-31T09:52:00.002-04:00

From Wikipedia:

By 1865 the practice of decorating soldiers' graves had become widespread in the North. General John Logan, National Commander of the Grand Army of the Republic--the society of Union Army veterans--called for all GAR posts to celebrate a "Decoration Day" on May 30, 1868. There were events in 183 cemeteries in 27 states in 1868, and 336 in 1869. The northern states quickly adopted the holiday; Michigan made "Decoration Day" an official state holiday in 1871 and by 1890 every northern state followed suit. The ceremonies were sponsored by the Women's Relief Corps, with 100,000 members.

By 1870, the remains of nearly 300,000 Union dead had been buried in 73 national cemeteries, located mostly in the South, near the battlefields. The most famous are the Gettysburg National Cemetery in Pennsylvania and the Arlington National Cemetery, near Washington.

The Memorial Day speech became an occasion for veterans, politicians and ministers to commemorate the war--and at first to rehearse the atrocities of the enemy. They mixed religion and celebratory nationalism and provided a means for the people to make sense of their history in terms of sacrifice for a better nation, one closer to God. People of all religious beliefs joined together, and the point was often made that the Germans and Irish soldiers had become true Americans in the "baptism of blood" on the battlefield. By the end of the 1870s the rancor was gone and the speeches praised the brave soldiers both Blue and Gray. By the 1950s, the theme was American exceptionalism and duty to uphold freedom in the world.

In Charleston, South Carolina in 1865 Freedmen (freed slaves) celebrated at the Washington Race Course (today the location of Hampton Park). The site had been used as a temporary Confederate prison camp for captured Union soldiers in 1865, as well as a mass grave for Union soldiers who died there. Immediately after the cessation of hostilities, Freedmen exhumed the bodies from the mass grave and reinterred them properly with individual graves. They built a fence around the graveyard with an entry arch and declared it a Union graveyard. On May 1, 1865, a crowd of up to ten thousand, mainly black residents, including 2800 children, proceeded to the location for events that included sermons, singing, and a picnic on the grounds, thereby creating the first Decoration Day.[2]

The first known observance was in Waterloo, New York on May 5, 1866, and each year thereafter. The friendship between General John Murray, a distinguished citizen of Waterloo, and General John A. Logan, who helped bring attention to the event nationwide, was likely a factor in the holiday's growth. On May 5, 1868, in his capacity as commander-in-chief of the Grand Army of the Republic, a veterans' organization, Logan issued a proclamation that "Decoration Day" be observed nationwide.[3] It was observed for the first time on May 30 of the same year; the date was chosen because it was not the anniversary of a battle. The tombs of fallen Union soldiers were decorated in remembrance.

Friday is for Friends & Family - The Debut!

2010-05-28T11:02:00.006-04:00

Last September my 4 year old daughter enrolled in Dance class. Every Saturday morning she gets up at 8am and drives herself to class. Just kidding. Every Saturday her mother brings her to class. After class they go out to breakfast together and then off to fun activities like shopping (my daughter loves Target like I love pizza). It has become their weekly Mommy-Daughter date.

This Saturday afternoon I get to see the fruit of my daughter's labor. She will be having her first recital. I've been offered a preview by way of the costumes she has brought home for her performance. One is a princess looking dress. The other if a frog. Yep, I said it, a frog. Evidently at some point she will be playing the part of a tap danging frog. Eat your heart out Michigan J. Frog! I expect this will be the showstopper!

Wild Card Thursday - News Flash!!

2010-05-27T11:41:00.004-04:00

MEN & WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT!

I know, startling news.
I've been going through a lot of "stuff" in our church and in my life recently. Some of it has been captured on this blog. Today I was reminded of the fact that my wife processes these events different from me. We've had a running dialogue all day via Blackberry Messenger and gaining her perspective is like looking at the same picture and seeing something completely different.

The best analogy I can give is the picture of Kramer, from the show Seinfeld,that you see on this post. For Seinfeld fans, you'll remember that a girlfriend of Jerry's has painted this picture of Kramer. An older couple looks at the picture and sees two different things. The husband is aghast and sees both the picture and the man in it as repugnant. The wife sees a masterpiece. She sees a deep intricate man and believes that the painting has captured his soul. In the end they both agree that they cannot look away and must buy the picture.

I encourage you to read this post by pastor and blogger Ron Edmonson. He examines this from the perspective of a familiar passage of scripture.

Two for Tuesday - Free to Choose

2010-05-25T12:12:00.004-04:00

This Sunday we resumed our series on Change.
Feel free to listen here.

Here's my controversial statement from the sermon.
"If you are a believer and struggling with a certain sin, it's because you choose to remain in that sin."
Agree, Disagree?

Romans 6 tells us that as Christians we have been freed from sin.
We have been freed from the POWER of sin in our life.
We are not free from the inclination to sin (Romans 7 makes that clear), but we no longer have to sin.

How do you handle temptation?
In light of this truth how will you proceed to deal with temptation?
If I told you that you are free to choose not to give in to your temptations what is your response?

Monday is for Marriage (Prep) - Communication

2010-05-24T10:14:00.004-04:00

Today is the second in a four part series on marriage preparation. Last week we looked at the expectations each party brings into marriage (read that post here). I made the point that learning to effectively communicate those expectations will help make managing them easier. Today we will look at communication.

A major part of my job is to stand in front of people and communicate to them. Preaching is very one-sided and it never ceases to amaze me that the words I use do not always communicate the intended message. It only takes a brief discussion with people to reveal the different messages that people received from the same sermon. This brings me to one of my overarching points, speaking words does not equal communication.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. (1 Corinthians 13:11)

Let's take a step of maturity and realize that just because you speak words it does not mean that you have communicated the intended message. Furthermore, raising your voice does not clarify or enhance your message delivery.

Overarching point number two, the key to communication is listening.

My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry (James 1:19)

Being a good listener will actually help you communicate well when you do open your mouth. In fact, the above verse highlights the link between good communication and anger management/conflict resolution (which we will discuss next week). In order to communicate you need to understand the perspective of the other person. In order to understand the other person's perspective you must exercise what is called "Active Listening".

In Active Listening you make a concerted effort to not only hear the words being spoken to you but also to understand the message the speaker is trying to communicate. You say, "Oh I already do that well!" Well, I guarantee you don't do it as well as you think and almost all statistics will back me on this matter. Active Listening does not necessarily come easy. You must work on it.

Here are the five elements of active listening.
1. Pay Attention
Seems simple enough. The point it to look the speaker in the eyes and give them your undivided attention. Turn off the radio, TV, or whatever may distract and give your full attention to the speaker. Take note of their body language. They will communicate a lot in regards to their emotions through their body language.

2. Be Aware of Your Body Language
Just as the speaker will communicate through body language, so will you. Your face may be looking at the speaker but if your body is turned away you are not communicating that you are "plugged in." So nod your head, smile, and keep your body turned toward the speaker.

3. Ask Clarifying Questions
Without cutting the speaker off, use questions to clarify what the speaker is saying. "So, when you say...do you mean....?" OR "When you say...what do you mean?" Use summary statements. "What I'm hearing is..."

4. Hold Back Judgment
Whether you agree or disagree right now you are trying to understand. Don't interrupt to argue your side. Listen to the feelings being expressed and realize that whether or not you intended to create these feelings, the speaker is telling you the truth as they have experienced it.

5. Respond in Love
Your natural instinct will be to justify your actions and/or argue points you believe are invalid. Biblical love puts aside self and acts on behalf of the other person. Think about what has been said and when you respond, respond in love. Maybe your first response should be to apologize. Maybe you should ask what the speaker would like to have you do. Whatever you do, make sure the speaker understands that YOU understand what they have said.

"But", you say, "I'm always the one listening. My fiance/spouse never listens to me!"

My response to the unmarried couple is that now you know what you have to work on. If your potential life partner is unwilling to work toward change now, YOU WILL NOT CHANGE THEM AFTER YOU GET MARRIED! Furthermore, if you are tempted to think that it's just a minor issue, I guarantee you that when you live with a person 24/7 minor issues become major issues. Remember, this is about marriage prep and part of marriage prep is making honest assessments.

To the married I say practice Active Listening in love, consistently, and continue to pray that God will open your spouses heart to change. Remember, you are not the only instrument of change that God will use to shape your spouse. I guarantee the Holy Spirit is more powerful than the "Holy Spouse". As is often the case with biblical love, start by being an example. BTW...you may learn things about your spouse that you didn't know. Maybe some of your assumptions will be debunked. No matter how long you've been married there will always be new things to learn about your spouse.

I can't wait to read your comments.
Next week - Anger & Conflict Resolution

Friday is for Friends & Family - 20 Years

2010-05-21T09:30:00.004-04:00

In 1990 my father informed me and my three brothers that he was dying. He shared that one of his kidneys was not functioning and would be removed and that the other kidney was failing. This meant that he would soon need to start gong to dialysis on a regular basis and the only "fix" would be if he received a kidney transplant. My father made it clear that he was dying and as such he had some final wishes for us.

I was 17, my older brother was 24, my younger brothers were 10 and 6. My older brother has medical issued so dad made it clear that over the next five year he wanted me to go to college and make something of myself in order to support the family. I don't really remember much beyond that. Over the years my younger brothers have shared that his message to them was that they needed to take care of mom.

Last night I visited my dad at the short term rehab facility where he is currently staying. Obviously he didn't die 20 years ago.

A lot can transpire in 20 years. In 1990 I was an angry teenager who was made even angrier by both the news and expectations put on me by my father. Twenty years later I am a husband, father, and Pastor. In 20 years my father has gone through too many days of dialysis. He received a kidney which was donated by a member of his church. He would learn that he has heart issues. He would go to the hospital for a biopsy. Three months after that biopsy he would collapse unexpectedly. He would spend three weeks in ICU and they would discover that during the biopsy an artery had been cut and he had been internally bleeding to death for 3 months. After living with a transplanted kidney for 10 years the stress of the biopsy accident would cause his kidney to fail. Once again he is in need of a transplant. Once again he goes to dialysis three times a week. Last Wednesday he went into the hospital for a "routine" procedure. For the medically knowledgeable, he was having his parathyroid gland removed. He went through the procedure with flying colors. After a day of resting in the hospital he was ready to go home. It was decided that he would receive dialysis at the hospital before leaving. During dialysis he had an ischemic episode. This setback caused him to spend the past week in the hospital and upon discharge he has needed to go to a short term rehab facility in order to rebuild his strength. Twenty years later, he's still here!

My dad was sure that he would die 20 years ago. God has had other plans. I have often thought that if God had sat my father down 20 years ago and laid out the "20 Year" plan he had for him my father might have opted out. TAKE ME NOW LORD JESUS! The fact is God has been just as busy working in my father's life the past 20 years as he will be in whatever amount of time that he has determined my father will continue to have on this earth. I don't know the answer to why? Well, I do in that general sense of God using the trials of life to make us more Christ-like. But that is something God can make clear to my dad. In fact, that is something that God has sought to make clear to my dad every step of the path. Frankly, it's something that God seeks to "work out" with YOU every step of the path he brings YOU down.

I went from being an angry teenager to being an angry college student until I finally came to the end of my angry self. There I found God's grace and mercy. I found direction. I dropped out of school determined not to live by anyone's expectations but God's. I figured that if I could just love God and serve him everything else would fall into place. It has.

Last week I was angry as I thought about the last 20 years. I didn't like how my dad had handled himself the past 20 years. I was angry and disappointed and...then I realized I was forcing my expectations on my father. After living under the pressure of his expectations for so long, now I was turning the table. That's when God reminded me that I am in the business of loving and serving not judging.

Last night I visited my dad at the short term rehab facility where he is staying. I loved him, served him, and thanked God for 20 years of working in both of our lives!

Reality Check

2010-05-20T11:49:00.005-04:00

1.It was just before the Passover Feast. Jesus knew that the time had come for him to leave this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he now showed them the full extent of his love. 2.The evening meal was being served, and the devil had already prompted Judas Iscariot, son of Simon, to betray Jesus. 3.Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; 4.so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. 5.After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples' feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him. 6.He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, "Lord, are you going to wash my feet?" 7.Jesus replied, "You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand." 8."No," said Peter, "you shall never wash my feet." Jesus answered, "Unless I wash you, you have no part with me." 9."Then, Lord," Simon Peter replied, "not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!" 10.Jesus answered, "A person who has had a bath needs only to wash his feet; his whole body is clean. And you are clean, though not every one of you." 11.For he knew who was going to betray him, and that was why he said not every one was clean. 12. When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. "Do you understand what I have done for you?" he asked them. 13. "You call me 'Teacher' and 'Lord,' and rightly so, for that is what I am. 14. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. 15. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. 16. I tell you the truth, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. 17. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them. (John 13:1-17)

The above passage needs little commentary so I will simply say that over the past week God has been reminding me of the lesson of this passage. A week ago my father went in to the hospital for a "routine" procedure. No procedure is routine and with my dad no health related issue is ever simple. True to form complications arose and what should have been an "in and out" situation turned into an extended stay at the hospital and now a short term care facility. God used these events to expose a "rough" area of my life that needs refining.

Until last night my whole approach to these events was being filtered through ME. That is, I was so consumed with how all of this affected me that I wasn't really thinking about my dad. God reminded me that my father didn't just need a son, he also needs a Pastor. Ouch! I realized that if this had been any other member of my church I would have a completely different approach. I would be consumed with them. I would be trying to empathize with them and minister to them at their point of need. Unfortunately this is not what I've been doing for my dad. Father-Son emotions have gotten in the way.

Not only did God bring this passage to mind he also reminded me that in September our church had a special service to kick off our ministry year. At the end of that service I prayed over each member and washed their feet dedicating myself to being a servant leader to them. It was like God was asking me, "How's that going with your dad?" OUCH!

Well, I am thankful that God speaks so clearly.
I wonder if there are areas of service where you struggle to be about people and not simply ministry for ministry sake?
Are there times when your emotions have kept you from serving God to your fullest capacity?
Feel free to comment.

8 Reminders for Difficult Times

2010-05-18T10:50:00.003-04:00

In recent months almost every person in my church has gone through a major trial. In fact, many of us are still in the midst of our trials. As such, this past Sunday I decided to break from the current series I am preaching and instead I offered a sermon of encouragement. My text was Psalm 18, you can listen to the sermon here. In this Psalm David recalls God’s faithfulness to him when he went through severe trials.

For today’s post I offer 8 things, from Psalm 18, to remember when life gets difficult.

1.God is your strength.
In verses 1-3 David speaks of God’s strength. Not only is it the very first line of the Psalm, it is reiterated with words like “Rock” and “Horn”. You may draw your strength from many places but I guarantee none will be as powerful as strength drawn from God.

2.God is your protection.
David uses words like “Shield”, “Fortress”, and “Stronghold” to describe God’s protection. All of these military terms reinforce the idea that in times of trouble we should flee to God. I’m reminded of Philippians 4:7-8 which encourages us not to worry but to bring everything to God so he can provide a peace that guards our heart and mind. We desperately need that kind of protection when we go through difficult times.

3.God hears your prayers and moves on your behalf.
The imagery of verses 6-19 is almost overwhelming. David cries out in verse 6 and is confident that God has heard him. In verse 9 he says that God “came down” to him. Ponder this, how reassuring is it to know that God will move all heaven and earth on your behalf?

4.God delights in you.
Verse 19 gives the reason for God’s dramatic action. God delights in you. Often times when we go through difficult times we need to rearrange our view of God. God doesn’t see us as a nuisance. We are not an afterthought to God. We are the apple of his eye!

5.Your faith will be rewarded.
Verses 20-26 paint a powerful picture of how God rewards those who take him seriously. Those who do right and honor God will know Him to be all that He has said. They will see Him be faithful to reward their faithfulness.

6.All that you accomplish is from God.
In verses 32-36 David begins retelling the story of all he accomplished in battle. Note that as he does this he is careful to reveal that it was not him working alone but God working through him. Job said, “The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord”. In difficult times it’s imperative to have the proper view of life. Not only will God strengthen us to survive the difficult times but it was Him that strengthened us in our days of fun and accomplishment.

7.You can know God’s presence.
It is his experience with God that allows David to know God’s existence is real. The power of difficult times is that they draw us closer to God. We see him first hand. We see him in power. He is real to us. In Philippians 3:10 Paul says he wants to know Christ and, “the fellowship of his suffering”. These words have always haunted me but I get it. Difficult times open the door to an intimate fellowship with God that is not known at any other time or in any other way.

8.God is worthy of praise.
As David concludes the matter in verse 49 his summary is that God is worthy of praise. David uses the word, “Therefore”. It is a summary conclusion. In light of all that has happened. In light of what I have come to see and know of God. It all adds up to this, PRAISE GOD!

Please feel free to comment and add other encouraging thoughts from this or any passage.

Monday is for Marriage (Prep) - Great Expectations

2010-05-17T11:58:00.004-04:00

Spring is here and love is in the air. I know of a several young adults who have gone public with their plans to get married. Believe it or not, many couples enter into marriage without receiving any premarital counseling. It’s been a while since I researched the statistics, but in 2006 I read an article that suggested that somewhere in the neighborhood of 40% of Christian couples don’t undergo premarital counseling. At that time I was a Youth and Young Adult Pastor. My wife and I decided to begin a small group study to assist young adults in assessing marriage readiness and to give them tools for marriage prep. We taught the course together in our home and those very intimate sessions have now become the material we utilize in a workshop that Divine Perspectives offers . You can either have my wife and I come and present the workshop or a condensed version is offered as part of the ENGAGE! conference.

Today is the first of four Monday posts in which I will present some thoughts from this study. While these ideas will be presented through the lens of marriage preparation, I assure you that married couples will also benefit. Today I will deal with Expectations!

Expectations are part of the baggage that each person brings into marriage. From the time you are a child your mind starts painting a picture of what you believe your married life will look like. Sometimes this is a conscious decision. For example, you may determine that when you are married you will not do something the way your parents do. It may also be unconscious as you accept views and norms from the culture.
Problems begin when your marriage doesn’t take shape the way you expect it. You quickly assess that the culprit is your new spouse. Not only are they doing a bad job of meeting your expectations, they keep trying to get you to fulfill their own “crazy” ideas. Can you believe it, they have arrived in the marriage with expectations of their own? You thought you were on the same page. You thought you knew each other so well and that you had the same goals. What has happened? The answer is that you have been sabotaged by un-communicated expectations!
Here’s some common complaints…
- When we were dating we couldn’t bear to be apart from each other. Now my spouse always wants space.
- You used to make me happy, why don’t you do that anymore?
- Guys…I really thought we’d have sex more often.
- Ladies…I thought we’d always be able to discuss our feelings.

The list could go on but here’s 3 suggestions to help both unmarried and married couples.
1. Make an honest evaluation of your expectations.

In the above example where the young lady is hurt that feelings aren’t discussed, an honest evaluation may reveal the following.
“I expect that when my husband and I get home from work he will greet me with a hug and a passionate kiss (not leading to sex). Then we will sit down and I will share about my day (He will listen attentively, not giving advice, just empathizing with me), and he will do the same (using complete sentences not one word answers).
As you can see, that’s quite an expectation!

2. Learn to communicate those expectations

We’ll discuss communication next Monday.

3. Realize that there may be some things that your partner is unable or unwilling to do.

This is hard because we naturally believe that if a person loves us they will WANT to do whatever makes us happy. However, this is not real life.
We’ll discuss this more when we discuss conflict resolution.

Something I’ve started doing in my premarital counseling is that I have each person write out their idea of a typical day of marriage. The guy usually submits a short list on a piece of scrap paper. The young lady submits her novel assuring me that she has already made several revisions. As we work through each person’s day sparks fly, but, they are now starting the process of putting expectations on the table.

Feel free to add your comments.
Next week we’ll talk about communication.

Friday is for Friends & Family - Brian Hart

2010-05-14T10:23:00.005-04:00

I first met Brian Hart three years ago. We instantly hit it off and I knew I had met a kindred spirit. Brian was part of a group of Pastors that were visiting New England, most for the first time, in order to see and hear firsthand the vision for church planting in this area. Brian had been to New England before. Ten years earlier he had planted a church in New Hampshire. God truly blessed that effort and it grew rapidly. Eventually Brian left that church and took a position teaching at a school in North Carolina. Now, at the request of a friend, Brian was returning in order to consider planting once again.

As I said, we hit it off and a few months later when I was told that Brian would be coming to CT to plant I was excited. Throughout our first year working together God provided Brian as a big support that I leaned on often. Brian will soon be moving on to plant yet another church in Maine. As we discussed this recently he jokingly asked if I could survive without him. My response was that I have outgrown my need for him. Typical manly banter! In reality we will remain close friends for the rest of our lives. We both know that we are only a phone call away and neither of us is too prideful to make that call. While our first year working together was about supporting one another our second year has been about spurring one another to grow. We have both grown. We have been iron sharpening iron and I thank God for Brian.

Brian's profile at Divine Perspectives presents him as a "man's Man". He actually doesn't like that "branding". He simply wants to be know as God's man. He is a humble, straight forward guy who is dedicated to fulfilling his call to lead people to love God and one another. Here's a little secret, he doesn't actually ride motorcycles!

Contact Divine Perspectives and book Brian to speak at your next event. You will be deeply blessed!

IT'S PEOPLE!

2010-05-13T11:14:00.006-04:00

Yesterday I spent the whole day with people from my church. I visited the hospital to be with a member having surgery. I spent time with his family while he was in surgery. I spent time on the phone with another member at another hospital also having a surgery as . I gathered with a group for a time of sharing and praying. I gathered for a group Bible study. I visited with someone going through some major changes while also suffering loss. I spent time connecting with my wife. I finished my day at the gym with another member.

In other words, I lived life among those whom I worship with!

It is very easy to get isolated from people. All of the new forms of social networking make it easy to both connect and also be disconnected. It’s easy for us ministry leaders to get so busy being “strategic “ that a wall of separation forms between “us” and “them”. After all, if “they” just understood “our” vision and the direction “we” are taking them they’d see all of their life problems vanish.

Don’t tune me out! I’m not raging against all that modern technology allows us to do. Books, blogs, and speaking at events are all powerful ways to minister to people. I’m just reminding us that the core of ministry is organic. That is, life to life.

As Charlton Heston said in the cult classic, Soylent Green, “It’s People!”

“And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others.” 2 Timothy 2:2

How much of your life are you investing in others on a personal, one on one, basis? That’s what the word “entrust” is speaking of in 2 Timothy 2:2. It’s about making a deposit. Am I depositing Christ likeness into someone else? Am I doing it from 10,00 feet or am I doing it “on the ground”.

I simply caution that when we ONLY do this from a distance we miss out. We don’t grow and develop as God intends. What shaped Paul’s life more, the fact that he invested his life in others at the ground level or the fact that he became a bestselling author? Ok, so his literary success was posthumous but you get my point. Paul didn’t set out to be a successful Christian writer and speaker. While I think he would have utilized Facebook, blogging and Twitter, I also think he would have counted his greatest ministry that which was done face to face, life to life.

I would love to hear what you think, especially if you disagree!

10 Reasons to Pray

2010-05-11T10:10:00.004-04:00

Tonight I have the privilege of leading a group of new/young believers in a Bible study. Tonight’s topic will be prayer. Prayer is both profound and simple. God says, “Ask!” That’s simple, but, it’s God that I’m approaching. That’s profound!

Below are my two favorite passages on prayer along with a list of 10 reasons we should pray. After reading through this, add one reason you pray.

1Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. 2He said: "In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men. 3And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.' 4"For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, 'Even though I don't fear God or care about men, 5yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won't eventually wear me out with her coming!'” 6And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. 7And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? 8I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?" (Luke 18:1-8)

1. God commands us to.
2. God invites us to.
3. In prayer we acknowledge our need for God.
4. In prayer we pray to the only one capable of answering our prayers.
5. God hears our prayers.
6. Prayer is a way of exercising our faith.
7. God ALWAYS answers our prayers.
8. If Jesus did it why shouldn’t we.
9. Prayer is communicating with God.
10. Prayer is the doorway to intimacy with God.

7"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. 9"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! (Matthew 7:7-11)

Why do you pray?

Monday is for Marriage - Courageous Submission

2010-05-10T09:52:00.007-04:00

This weekend we took a look at the story of Abigail, David, and Nabal in 1 Samuel 25. The sermon is entitled, "Lessons From the Fool's Wife".
Wives, what do you do when your husband has chosen to head down a path of destruction?
If you grew up in an independent fundamental church like myself, the common answer was, "shut up and go along for the ride!" Obviously I'm not convinced that's what the Bible teaches.

In the passage we are told that Abigail was an intelligent, beautiful woman. When her household is in jeopardy she acts. This prompts me to conclude that,
"Submission doesn't mean that you do nothing when your husband is acting in an ungodly manner"
As the passage bears out, we see Abigail's intelligence and inner beauty played out before us. She remains respectful yet truthful about her husband and his shortcomings. She doesn't bury her head in the sand. When informed of Nabal's foolish actions she doesn't sit back and conclude that his decisions are equal to God's will for their household. Instead, she acts. She literally stands in the gap between life and death for her family.

Would to God that we had more courageous wives like that!

Take a few minutes and listen to the whole sermon here.
Then I'd love to hear from you.

Back to a Life of Prayer

2010-05-07T09:32:00.003-04:00

Well, all the hullabaloo of the National day of Prayer has past. I guess for us Christ followers is back to the grind of a personal life of prayer.

Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. (Luke 18:1)

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. (Romans 12:12)

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints. (Ephesians 6:18)

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Philippians 4:6)

Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. (Colossians 4:2)

Pray continually (1 Thessalonians 5:17)

I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone (1 Timothy 2:1)

The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray (1 peter 4:7)

I think the most ridiculous quote I heard yesterday was,
“If you don’t pray and you feel ostracized from all the prayer activities going on, then it’s really a blow to the separation of church and state”
I think I’ll just pray for this person.

Yes, The Church Has Hypocrites!

2010-05-06T09:57:00.009-04:00

I had the privilege of speaking at a men’s retreat last weekend. I was assigned one main session and one break-out session with the youth and young adults. For the main session I did a sermon that is the first of a 4 part series that I’ve entitled, “Legacy”. A legacy is something you leave behind and in my series I examine Paul’s words to Timothy in the book of 2 Timothy. Here we see an aged and imprisoned Paul imparting a legacy to Timothy.

In my address this weekend I looked at the biggest detriment men face in trying to pass along a legacy of faith, hypocrisy. As a youth pastor I quickly learned that working with teens opens a window into a family’s private life. Few things are more detrimental to your children’s spiritual growth than when you are a hypocrite. Regardless what you portray to people on Sunday, your kids live with you Monday through Saturday and they see the real you.

The problem isn’t just isolated to parents. I didn't get into this in my sermon but in this post I'd like to explore the fact that the church is loaded with hypocrites. It’s one of the top complaints about the church, and Christianity, by the unchurched. I’ve had adults, young adults, and youth all point fingers at the church and level the charge of hypocrisy. So what are we to do about it?

When the charge is leveled my first response is always the words that make up the title of this post. “Yes, the church has hypocrites!” Let’s acknowledge it. It does us no good to stick our head in the sand and act like it isn’t true. If scripture acknowledges it, we’ll get to that in a moment, then we ought to as well. I am never afraid or ashamed to admit that the church, any given local church, may have hypocrites. Don’t get me wrong, I think hypocrisy is shameful but that’s no reason for me to hang my head and abandon Christ’s bride.

According to the Bible there are two types of hypocrites in the church.
The first is hypocrites that aren’t real Christians.
Check out Jesus’ words in the following three passages.
"Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You shut the kingdom of heaven in men's faces. You yourselves do not enter, nor will you let those enter who are trying to. (Matthew 23:13, NIV, emphasis added)
"Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You travel over land and sea to win a single convert, and when he becomes one, you make him twice as much a son of hell as you are. (Matthew 23:15)
"He will cut him to pieces and assign him a place with the hypocrites, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth." (Matthew 24:51)

In these passages Jesus is talking to religious leaders and makes it clear that despite all of their religious activity, they are NOT true followers of God.

How about this passage from Matthew.
"24. Jesus told them another parable: "The kingdom of heaven is like a man who sowed good seed in his field. 25. But while everyone was sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat, and went away. 26. When the wheat sprouted and formed heads, then the weeds also appeared. 27. "The owner's servants came to him and said, 'Sir, didn't you sow good seed in your field? Where then did the weeds come from?' 28. " 'An enemy did this,' he replied. "The servants asked him, 'Do you want us to go and pull them up?' 29. " 'No,' he answered, 'because while you are pulling the weeds, You may root up the wheat with them. 30. Let both grow together until the harvest. At That time I will tell the harvesters: First collect the weeds and tie them in bundles to be burned; then gather the wheat and bring it into my barn.' “…
36. Then he left the crowd and went into the house. His disciples came to him and said, "Explain to us the parable of the weeds in the field." 37. He answered, "The one who sowed the good seed is the Son of Man. 38. The field is the world, and the good seed stands for the sons of the kingdom. The weeds are the sons of the evil one, 39. and the enemy who sows them is the devil. The harvest is the end of the age, and the harvesters are angels. 40. "As the weeds are pulled up and burned in the fire, so it will
be at the end of the age. 41. The Son of Man will send out his angels, and they will weed out of his kingdom everything that causes sin and all who do evil. 42. They will throw them into the fiery furnace, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth. 43. Then the righteous will shine like the sun in the kingdom of their Father. He who has ears, let him hear." (Matthew 24:24-30, 36-43)

If I understand this correctly, until “the harvest” (v, 30) there will always be unbelievers mixed in with the believing crowd of the church. Without evoking an eschatological argument over when the harvest is, I think we can agree that this means that in our lifetime this “mix” will be in place.
I believe this gives us a better understanding of passages like Matthew 7:21-23 where people who have lived their lives doing things in the name of God are shocked to find out that they never really had a relationship with him.

The Second group is real Christians that are sinning.
Again, it happens. Being a Christian doesn’t mean that you are perfect. So stop telling people you are and stop trying to get unbelievers to act morally (Sorry, that’s for another post). Among others, the Apostle Peter fell into this.

"11. When Peter came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face, because he was clearly in the wrong. 12. Before certain men came from James, he used to eat with the Gentiles. But when they arrived, he began to draw back and separate himself from the Gentiles because he was afraid of those who belonged to the circumcision group. 13. The other Jews joined him in his hypocrisy, so that by their hypocrisy even Barnabas was led astray. 14. When I saw that they were not acting in line with the truth of the gospel, I said to Peter in front of them all, "You are a Jew, yet you live like a Gentile and not like a Jew. How is it, then, that you force Gentiles to follow Jewish customs?" (Galatians 2:11-14)

And, Jesus warned us about it.
3. "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4. How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5. You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye. (Matthew 7:3-5)

If we’re honest we will admit that at some time in our life we have been a hypocrite. So, upon being confronted with the charge of hypocrisy in the church I admit the church’s and my personal shortcomings and ensure my antagonist that what we both should be looking to see is a place where people are becoming less hypocritical. After all, in the end, the hypocrite fools nobody.
And to you parents, I challenge you with these words,
You can’t leave a legacy of faith when you only exercise your faith for an hour each week on Sunday.

5 Reasons Why Your Church Should Host ENGAGE!

2010-05-05T10:39:00.002-04:00

ENGAGE! is a conference that Divine Perspectives offers for young adults age 18-30ish.
It includes main sessions with dynamic worship and passionate speakers as well as hands-on workshops that address topics relevant to that age group. The content was developed while I was serving as a youth and young adult pastor and has been applied to many lives.

Below are 5 reason why your church should consider hosting an ENGAGE! conference.

1. Current statistics show that almost 80% of young adults who grew up in the church leave when they graduate from high school and never return. You’ve already lost many, don’t lose more.

2. Engage helps you move the young adults that attend your church from spectators to participants.

3. Not only will your young adults be challenged to serve your church they’ll also be equipped to engage their “circle of influence” with the gospel.

4. We don’t just “show up”, we work with you through the whole process to plan and implement a high impact event with lasting results.

5. Our cost structure works for small budgets and it offers the opportunity for you to recoup some or all of your financial investment.

Now I'd love to hear from you.
What areas of young adult ministry does your church struggle with?
How could a ministry like Divine Perspectives assist you?
Feel free to comment.

The Elevator Pitch

2010-05-04T08:57:00.002-04:00

This blog is perpetually in transition. The main reason is that I have yet to find my voice. I hope to improve this as I am currently following blogger Paul Steinbruek as he leads an online workshop of Darren Rowse’s “31 Days to Build a Better Blog”. Yesterday’s lesson was entitled “The Elevator Pitch”. Wikipedia defines and Elevator pitch as,
“An overview of an idea for a product, service, or project. The name reflects the fact that an elevator pitch can be delivered in the time span of an elevator ride (for example, thirty seconds or 100–150 words).” —Wikipedia

The point is focus, something this blog has lacked. The lesson forced me to ask three questions,
1. Why am I blogging?
2. Who am I blogging for?
3. What am I blogging about?

I blog for two reasons. First, to get ideas out of my head. They tend to roll around in there tormenting me until I finally find a platform to release them. Second, to spread awareness of Divine Perspectives.
So, I blog for myself but obviously I think there is value to others if I am willing to put my posts in a public forum. Therefore I would refine this even more to say that I blog as a way of introducing myself to prospective clients and allowing them to get a flavor for me and this ministry.
The “what” has historically been scattered. Going forward I plan to blog about life and my personal experiences BUT I plan to do so in a way that highlights this ministries purpose. That is, seeing life through God’s perspective.

With that said I offer this Elevator Pitch for this blog going forward.
“The Divine Perspectives blog reminds people how God sees them and their situations so they can realign themselves with his purposes”

And for the Divine Perspectives ministry, I believe our description says it all.
“Divine Perspectives exists to help small and medium size churches plan and implement events that will motivate and equip their members to be used by God.”

Exponential Conference : A Two-Year Perspective (part 3)

2010-05-03T01:21:00.006-04:00

My trip to Exponential 2010 had a threefold goal. Hear from God, make some connections, meet and interact with some authors. My last post dealt with authors so this concluding post will deal with the other two components I mentioned.

Exponential was created for the purpose of building connections. It is designed to bring together planters and church planting networks thereby creating partnerships and synergy. I wanted to make connections is 3 areas. First, I wanted to get a firm grasp of the different church planting networks that are out there. It is hard to believe how this movement has spread in the last few years. In a lot of ways it’s vogue for young men coming out of Bible colleges and Seminaries to plant churches. I believe this can be traced to the creation of church planting networks. Acts 29, Kairos, and Ignite are just a few of these networks. During the conference I made it a point to talk with and establish connections with each network I encountered. I am currently planting through the Southern Baptist Convention but as a church plant looking to plant other churches quickly I want to make sure I am connected with as many networks as possible.

The second connection I wanted to make is in the area of coaching. I believe it is vital for church planters to have strong competent coaching, which I believe is different from mentoring. I also believe that right now, I need a coach. Again the conference offered several coaching ministries that I was able to connect with.

Third, I wanted to make connections with churches in regards to my ministry, Divine Perspectives. I launched this ministry to assist small to medium size churches facilitate events at a reasonable cost. Let me make my point using Exponential as an example. Exponential is attended by many Pastors of church plants and churches that are not very old. If one of those churches wanted to do a conference, workshop or seminar event, chances are they wouldn’t be able to bring in the speakers that had just challenged them at Exponential. DP offers top quality passionate speakers, consultants, and workshop leaders at affordable prices. Also, we offer a full range of support services. In essence, a church could simply offer it’s building as the site for the event, pay DP a reasonable sum, and DP will make all the arrangements including booking speakers, praise bands, and marketing through local media channels.
Furthermore, it is my desire to launch a conference for young adults though DP. The conference is called ENGAGE! After spending years in youth and young adult ministry it is my attempt to equip and empower young adults in the church while reaching out to those who have abandoned the church.
Exponential’s workshops provided opportunities and I was able to connect with other Pastors and denominational leaders who were excited by the idea of the young adult conference.

In the end, the most important goal was to hear from God. That I did. I arrived as Louie Giglio hit the stage and frankly, God is still talking to me as I review notes from both the main sessions and workshops. My woefully inept summary is simply, it’s about being not doing. Over and over God reminded me of the simple yet profound fact that I need to be ever so careful to allow him to do his transforming work in my life. It’s not about gathering a crowd. It’s not about counting numbers. It’s not about trying to predict how people will react to what I say. It’s about growing in Christ, living the greatest commandment to love God with all of my being. And allowing my life to be a conduit of his grace poured out to others.

Exponential Conference : A Two-Year Perspective (part 2)

2010-04-30T17:52:00.002-04:00

My experience at Exponential 2010 was very different from 2009.
To begin with, I arrived much more focused. God has been doing a work in my life over the past few months and this year’s theme of “Transformation Starts in the Heart of One” was straight from God. The fact is, God has been all over me about “being” over “doing”. As a ministry leader it is so easy to move from event to event, program to program, ministry to ministry and minimize the fact that God is seeking to work IN ME before he works THROUGH ME! Therefore, I arrived at Exponential 2010 weary from doing and ready to hear from God.

This year I brought my wife with me. Actually, I brought my wife, daughter and mother with me. Since the conference doesn’t have childcare my daughter stayed at the hotel with my mom. I have a hard time being at events without my wife. After all, I married her to share life together. What fun is it to be at overwhelming, life changing events without the one that completes me?

So, this year was about hearing from God, meeting authors, and making connections. Today I’ll deal with the authors. Tomorrow I’ll conclude this series by dealing with the connections and God’s ministry to me.

Since last year I have immersed myself in books on ministry and church planting. It isn’t that I didn’t read before, I’ve just been immersed in books on theology and commentaries. It has been nice to step back and explore the broader realm of Christian publishing.
First I met Dave and Jon Ferguson. They were giving out and signing copies of their new book, Exponential. While I appreciate receiving the book and look forward to reading it, I spoke with them about their previous book, The Big Idea. In the book they help churches communicate one message through each arm of their Sunday programs. As a former youth Pastor I see this as a God send. In that capacity I always sought to partner with parents as they fulfill their God given responsibility to raise their children to know and love God. When each ministry of a church is communicating the same consistent message each week, that message is easier to remember and apply. Think about it, parents can ask their children what they learned in Sunday School or Junior Church knowing that it will be the same thing they learned in worship service.
I shared with Jon and Dave that I am currently working to implement this into my current church plant. They were glad to hear how helpful the book is and offered to be available for further assistance.

Next was Ed Stetzer. I purchased his new book Viral Churches then headed to his workshop on it. Ed was Ed! He was full of information presented in a lighthearted but challenging way. After the workshop I spoke with him and had him sign my book. I asked him some personal questions that my wife has been dying to know the answer to and he gave a very straightforward answer. Gotta love Ed!

On to Larry Osborne. All my church planting buddies know Larry as the Sticky Church guy. I know Larry as the Contrarian’s Guide to Knowing God guy. It was this book that really started the aforementioned current work of God in my life. This book re-examines how spiritual formation happens on a practical level. It really focused me on “being” who God wants me to be. I shared this with Larry and he lit up and told me that of all the books he’s written it is, by far, his favorite. He said it’s very personal and writing it was a powerful experience. Interestingly he also noted that it is, by far, his worst seller. We laughed and he explained why that is. All in all it was great to talk to him.

Finally was Francis Chan. For this one I felt like a stalker. The day before Francis spoke my friend had pointed out where the speakers lounge was. He made the obvious observation that he had run into a lot of the speakers by hanging around that area. It was just before the final session in which Francis was scheduled to speak. I was talking to my wife saying that she needed to give me her copy of Francis’ book Crazy Love so that I could have him sign it if I ran into him. At that moment he came out of the lounge and headed up the path toward me. I pulled out the book and showed it to him. His response,
“Hey, that’s a pretty neat book you’ve got there”
As he signed it I let him know I was praying for him as he goes through his current transition and I couldn’t help but put in a plug for him to come start a work in New England. I think my exact words were, “New England has cities too!”
He laughed and said that he’d just been to New York to visit Jim Cymbala.

So, those were my encounters. My buddy told me I was being like a teenage girl but my point was to let these men know that God was using their efforts and to encourage them to “be” what God has called them to be.

Exponential Conference : A Two-Year Perspective (part 1)

2010-04-29T15:16:00.006-04:00

I was introduced to the Exponential Conference in 2009. In a word, it was OVERWHELMING! Not just the conference but the whole experience. The group of church planters I traveled with borrowed my parents mini-van to get us all from CT to JFK. From there we flew to Orlando, waited an hour to rent another mini-van, and checked into a Days Inn hotel that was so far below my standards. (I’ll post about my hotel anxieties another time) By the time we got to the conference site we were late for the first session. By the time we found the right building, got parked and found the sanctuary the first session was over. Not really, but almost.
As I looked through a window into the sanctuary Erwin McManus was wrapping up his time. This is noteworthy in that he was one of the only guys I knew and wanted to see. I’ve never been an “in the loop” kind of guy. I have come a long way in a year but in 2009 my knowledge of “pop” Christianity was woefully inept. Even in the subculture of church planting, where I make my living, I was extremely unaware of the leading authors and experts. I digress.
The experience remained overwhelming as I went from workshop to workshop, main session to main session listening to people I did not know but whom my colleagues kept assuring me I had to see and hear. By day two I was officially tired of hearing church planting “sob stories” from people who had launched churches with 300 people only to see their attendance die to 100 before they were revived and reached their current attendance of 500. I heard it from workshop leaders and attendees alike. My response, “Get REAL!” I come from New England. A church of 300 in New England is a mega-church. You want to be a real church planter? Come to where the soil is rocky and infertile. I know, it wasn’t the best attitude but it’s where I was.
In the end three people stood out to me.
Ed Stetzer.
Ed hosted a lunch and talked about planting “pregnant” churches. I regularly talk to my church plant about being born pregnant and all the Trekkies wig out. Since then I’ve been following Ed on Twitter. I probably stalk him a little too much. My wife has even gotten into it. We really like when he talks about his family life. Saturday mornings at Cracker Barrel and having his daughter’s friends invade his house for sleepovers are the stuff! Keep it real baby!
Will Mancini
I met Will completely by accident. My friend and I had skipped out on a session and were wandering through the Exponential Lounge desperately looking for free items. We came across the table where Will’s book, Church Unique, had been displayed. My friend really wanted the book and was disappointed that there were no more copies available. At that moment a young gentleman came by and started talking to us. Really he was talking to my friend because I was disinterested. He asked where we were from which perked me up and provoked my above retort about New England church planting. He got it! He smiled and told us about his relatives living in Rhode Island and how hard it was for ministries like his to work with churches in New England. He even invited us to join him in Philadelphia for an upcoming conference. I’m not the sharpest tool on the shed but I quickly realized that there was something special about this guy. When my friend asked him if he had anymore copies of his book I put two and two together. This was the “Church Unique” guy! I had been dragged out to one of his early morning workshops and had really liked what he had said. Now I was talking with him and he even understood my “plight”. Throughout the year I have kept up with Will on Twitter as well.
Francis Chan.
I had no idea who Mr. Chan was before hearing him at the closing session. His words were so powerful they brought me to tears. In fact, a week before attending this year’s conference I went online, download the session, and listened to it again. Again it brought me to tears. Chan really “saved” the experience for me in 2009. His words broke me of my bad attitude and re-centered me. He was reason I was determined to return in 2010 with a focus on making the most of the experience.

Tomorrow, Exponential 2010.

What is Divine Perspectives?

2010-04-28T19:51:00.004-04:00

A Divine Perspective is when we see someone or something the way God sees them. This ministry is about serving the body of Christ by helping churches facilitate events that will provide Divine Perspectives for their members.

Think about it, what if you had the ability to “step out” of your marriage and see it the way God sees it? To see, “the forest for the trees.” What if you were able to see the “Big Picture” of life? I believe that’s exactly what God offers those who are his followers. The Bible calls it FAITH and the book of Hebrews reminds us that, “without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” (Heb 11:6) In other words, placing your faith in God is the beginning of living with a Divine Perspective. As we walk with God, he opens are eyes to see all of life the way he sees it.

This isn’t always easy. In fact, throughout our lifetime we need to be led by God’s Spirit and lovingly reminded by others. Don’t worry, were not alone in this. 2 Kings 6:15-17 is a great example. The prophet Elisha is surrounded by an enemy army that has come to capture him. He is calm but his servant, not so much. Elisha prays that God will reveal to his servant why he is so calm. In this powerful moment God reveals the Divine Perspective for the servant. The servant looks up and sees that surrounding the enemy army is the invisible army of the Lord.

While our experiences won’t always be so dramatic, we are called to live by faith not by sight. This means that we are called to act according to what we believe about God not simply by what we tangibly see and comprehend.

Conferences, seminars, and workshops are a great ways to gather and be reminded of Divine Perspectives. These types of events refresh, equip, and motivate people as they are reminded of God’s Divine Perspective and how it applies to their life. Therefore, it is my desire to serve you and your church by helping you facilitate such events.

My name is Brendan Saunders and I'm the President and Founder of Divine Perspectives LLC. Along the journey this blog will capture my thoughts and reflections. I welcome your comments.

Trusting God

2010-02-15T21:45:00.003-05:00

This one's going to be short because I am very tired.
Our church had a very powerful event this past weekend.

We held a marriage and family workshop based on the concepts found in Dr. Gary Chapman's book, The Five Love Languages.
35 people attended the event. 12 of the attendees were from our church. This means the rest, more than half, were from the community. That's AWESOME!

If you have never read the book please go to your local bookstore and get a copy. It has the power to change your relationships. I'm talking about marriages as well as parent-child relationships. The concepts are even useful for singles and in fact, there is a version of the book for singles.

Anyways, here's why I'm writing tonight.
As a minister it is extremely hard not to think of certain people as you prepare for sermons and teaching opportunities. At some point while you prepare and review the content of your message you will think of people that can benefit from what you are about to teach. I think this is a good thing...BUT...inevitably, those people are rarely in attendance when you preach/teach that message. I'm not kidding! I learned this many years ago. You could have a person who has had perfect attendance for years in your church. The day you deliver a message that has made you think of them and that you are sure will be exactly what they need to hear, they will not be in attendance. They will have received a free trip to Tahiti, have a family emergency, or will just decide to take a day off! IT NEVER FAILS!

So what do you do? Well, I've learned to pray for that person. If I think of people during sermon and teaching prep I pray for them right then. I pray that God, who is in much better control of their life than I, will reach them with this message however and whenever he chooses. I pray that I will be attentive to them and if these points are so necessary for them to hear and understand then I pray that God will give me opportunity to present it to them in the course of my conversations and dealings with them. In other words, I realize God will use much more than my sermon to work in their life. I just want to remain open to being a part of that process. When Sunday rolls around and they aren't in attendance it's ok, God works 24/7 throughout a lifetime.

Yes, there were specific people I wish had been at our event. Yes, they did not attend. But I believe that God, and the Holy Spirit, weren't sitting on the edge of Heaven hoping the people in my mind would attend. No, He was busy working in their life then, now, and in the days to come. At some point he may use me in that process. If so, I'll be happy to share. In the meantime, there were 35 other people who needed what we presented.

Do We Over Value Peace?

2010-02-01T10:04:00.003-05:00

As a pastor I am always piqued with interest when I hear a fellow pastor share that things are peaceful at the church they shepherd. Usually they share something like, "It's such a joy in the church right now. There's just a sweet spirit of peace". Being the contrarian I am I usually ask some questions to ferret this out a bit and what it usually means is that there is currently an absence of "trouble makers". Nobody is asking tough questions, nobody is being outspoken against anything, everybody is content to maintain the status-quo.

Before I go any farther let me emphatically state that I believe one of the most powerful commands for the church is found in Philippians 2:1-4
1If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. 3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
The church must be unified. We must continually work to be on the same page and headed in the same direction. We also need to have diversity in unity. This not only means diversity of ethnicity and socioeconomic status but also diversity of thought, opinion, and personality.

Too often when I examine "peaceful" churches what I find is stagnation. Stagnation because nobody is asking the tough questions. Stagnation because there are no dissenting voices. Stagnation because a peaceful church is a church where everybody is getting what THEY want out of the experience while forgetting that church, and life itself, is not about ME! It's about God!
Read through Acts 1-15 and see how peaceful things were for the church. Acts 4 - dissension with the religious powers that be brings boldness in the church. Acts 5 - untruthfulness is exposed with Ananias and Sapphira with the result being deeper devotion to God. Acts 6-8 - persecution brings the spread of the gospel beyond Jerusalem. Acts 11 - criticism of Peter leads to a clarification of the gospel and the new work God is doing through the church. Acts 12 - Peter's arrest brings the church together in prayer. Acts 15 - criticism of Paul's ministry leads to Jerusalem council which results in greater clarity of the gospel and the life believers ought to live. Even Paul and Barnabas' disagreement led to the further spread of the gospel and the development of the man in question, Mark. Clearly the Bible teaches that God uses both internal and external pressure to shape his people and his church.

Don't get me wrong, I don't go to bed each night praying that God will bless my church with contention and strife but I also realize he will use it (fairly regularly) to draw us closer to Him. To help us see his power. To make us appreciate Him and His work. To drive us from our agenda to his.

As a leader I may appreciate when the local church is free of strife but I must also use those times to examine where we are. Have I simply surrounded myself with people of the same personality? (There's a difference between like-mindedness and mind numbed robots) Have I erroneously quieted all counter points? Is the church fulfilling my personal vision or God's vision for it?

If you are on God's agenda and experiencing peace then Hallelujah! I mean it! It's rare! Usually pursuing God's agenda brings opposition, internal and external. However, my point is that not all opposition is bad. God uses both sinful opposition and constructive opposition.

As leaders, let's not think that "peace" automatically equals, God's Favor.

The Battle Rages

2010-01-12T10:32:00.003-05:00

10.Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11.Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. 12.For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13.Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand…18.And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints. (Eph 6:10-13, 18)

Lately I have been keenly aware of the spiritual battle that rages. I don’t know if this heightened awareness is because I am a Pastor and our church is rolling out our direction for the coming year or if God is just working on this area of my life. I suppose the answer is probably “All of the Above” and then some. Regardless, in subtle and not so subtle ways I personally, and we as a church, have been confronted with the reality and scope of this battle. Sometimes it’s as subtle as doubting whether a planned activity is worthwhile. Other times it’s as up front as being tempted to fall back into a sinful habit.

During this time some points from the above passage have become very real to me.

1. I am powerless on my own. I can’t change myself or anyone else. I need to know God’s power and I need to know how it is activated in my life and circumstances. (v.10)
2. The process of being strong in the Lord involves preparing myself for battle EVERY DAY! Satan does not take a day off. The Devil is real and he has a plan of attack which he implements every day. Am I aware of how he works in my life and in the life of the church? Am I aware of the weak areas of my life that he seeks to exploit? Do I have a plan to deal with his attacks? (v.11)
3. The biggest thing that Satan likes to do is get us focused on fighting people. Your battle is not against the people who bring trouble into your life. Do you think it is a coincidence that Jesus said the greatest commandment is to love God and the second is to love people? Do you think it’s possible to fulfill the second command without fulfilling the first? Do you think Satan shakes up our human relationships purposely, knowing that it will often cause us to lose sight of God? (v.12)
4. We live in the “Day of evil.” Each day we traverse in the “Day of evil.” Now take note of this, we are told to stand. Brothers and sisters we must withstand the blows and attacks of Satan every day. As we learn to do this, God takes the offensive. He delivers victory. He builds his church. Satan must give way. (v.13)
5. This awareness of the battle has brought me to my knees over and over again. It needs to bring us to our knees individually and as a church. I cannot put it more clearly than this…WE NEED TO PRAY! (v.18)

Best of 2009

2009-12-31T22:43:00.007-05:00

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Restoration? Please Define!

2009-12-27T22:22:00.003-05:00

As the year draws to a close yet another brother has fallen.
I am a Pastor and in my few years of ministry I have seen too many of my fellow Pastors fall into sexual sin. Honestly, it started when I was still in Bible college. Guys would graduate and head off to full-time ministry and a year later they would be out of ministry because of sexual immorality. Some never graduated. They would go off to participate in summer ministries and they'd get in trouble.
Marriages broken, churches broken, trust broken!

Don't get me wrong, I'm not throwing stones. I happen to live in a glass house and to be honest, it scares me to death! I know myself, my areas of weakness, my propensity to sin. Each time someone I know personally, or who's ministry has impacted my life, falls it takes a piece of me. My first summer home from Bible college the news broke of a fellow student who got in trouble working as a counselor at a youth camp. I remember sitting in my parents basement crying for hours.

This year the list was short but "power packed". William Branch (aka. The Ambassador), Gary Lamb, Paul Sheppard. All of them men who's ministries had great impact on me personally. As for Branch and Lamb they are men that I was privileged to talk to up close and personal.

Let me cut to the quick.
This post isn't about these men, my disappointment in them, or my prayers for their families. It's about a common response I have seen amongst believers commenting on their situations. The common response is wishes that they are quickly restored.

Restored to what? In most cases it seems that people commenting have a desire for the church to show the world a great example of love and forgiveness by restoring these men to their leadership positions.
I find this troubling. I too want restoration for these men. Restoration to fellowship! I am not convinced that the bible teaches that these men should be restored to their leadership positions.

Well, I had planned to go on about this at length...but...I stumbled across something John MacArthur has written and I have decided to re-post it here and let people chew on it and comment before I come back and share more of my thoughts.

Here it is...
Should Fallen Pastors Be Restored?
John MacArthur
Grace to You

It has always saddened me over the years as I’ve watched church leaders bring a reproach on the church of Jesus Christ. What’s shocking to me is how frequently Christian leaders sin grossly, then step back into leadership almost as soon as the publicity dies away.

Some time ago I received a cassette tape that disturbed me greatly. It was a recording of the recommissioning service of a pastor who had made national news by confessing to an adulterous affair. After little more than a year of “counseling and rehabilitation,” this man was returning to public ministry with his church’s blessing.

That is happening everywhere. Restoration teams—equipped with manuals to instruct the church on how to reinstate their fallen pastor—wait like tow-truck drivers on the side of the highway, anticipating the next leadership “accident”. Our church has received inquiries wondering if we have written guidelines or a workbook to help restore fallen pastors to leadership. Many no doubt expect that a church the size of ours would have a systematic rehabilitation program for sinning leaders.

Gross sin among Christian leaders is a signal that something is seriously wrong with the church. But an even greater problem is the lowering of standards to accommodate a leader’s sin. That the church is so eager to bring these men back into leadership is a symptom of rottenness at the core.

Some have claimed that a leader’s failure makes him more effective in shepherding fallen people. That is ludicrous. Should we drag the bottom of sin’s cesspool for the most heinous sinners to lead the church? Are they better able to understand the sinner? Certainly not! Our pattern for ministry is the sinless Son of God. The church is to be like Him and her leaders are to be our models of Christlikeness.

We must recognize that leadership in the church cannot be regarded lightly. The foremost requirement of a church leader is that he be above reproach (1 Timothy 3:2, 10; Titus 1:7). That is a difficult prerequisite, and not everyone can meet it.

There are some sins that irreparably shatter a man’s reputation and disqualify him from a ministry of leadership forever. Even Paul, man of God that he was, said he feared such a possibility. In 1 Corinthians 9:27 he says, “I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified.”

When referring to his body, Paul obviously had sexual immorality in view. In 1 Corinthians 6:18 he describes it as a sin against one’s own body—sexual sin is in its own category. Certainly it disqualifies a man from church leadership since he permanently forfeits a blameless reputation as a one-woman man (Proverbs 6:33; 1 Timothy 3:2).

Where did we get the idea that a year’s leave of absence and some counseling can restore integrity to someone who has squandered his reputation and destroyed people’s trust? Certainly not from the Bible. Trust forfeited is not so easily regained. Once purity is sacrificed, the ability to lead by example is lost forever. As my friend Chuck Swindoll once commented when referring to this issue—it takes only one pin to burst a balloon.

What about forgiveness? Shouldn’t we be eager to restore our fallen brethren? To fellowship, yes. But not to leadership. It is not an act of love to return a disqualified man to public ministry; it is an act of disobedience.

By all means we should be forgiving. But we cannot erase the consequences of sin. I am not advocating that we “shoot our wounded.” I’m simply saying that we shouldn’t rush them back to the front lines, and we should not put them in charge of other soldiers. The church should do everything possible to minister to those who have sinned and repented. But that does not include restoring the mantle of leadership to a man who has disqualified himself and forfeited the right to lead. Doing so is unbiblical and lowers the standard God has set.

So why is the contemporary church so eager to be tolerant? I’m certain a major reason is the sin and unbelief that pervade the church. If casual Christians can lower the expectations on their leadership, they will be much more comfortable with their own sin. With lower moral standards, the church becomes more tolerant of sin and less tolerant of holiness. The “sinner-friendly” church is intolerable to God—that is a frightening condition.

Conservative Christians have for most of the previous century focused on the battle for doctrinal purity. And that is good. But we are losing the battle for moral purity. Some of the worst defeats have occurred among our more visible leaders. The church cannot lower the standard to accommodate them. We should hold it higher so we can regain purity. If we lose here, we have utterly failed, no matter how orthodox our confession of faith. We can’t win if we compromise the biblical standard of moral purity.

What should you do in the current crisis? Pray for your church’s leaders. Keep them accountable. Encourage them. Let them know you are following their godly example. Understand that they are not perfect, but continue nonetheless to call them to the highest level of godliness and purity. The church must have leaders who are genuinely above reproach. Anything less is an abomination.

Adapted from The Master’s Plan for the Church, © 1991 by John MacArthur. All rights reserved.

When Spiritual Leaders Don't Hear God

2009-12-21T10:40:00.000-05:00

I have been reading through Jeremiah in my quiet time. For spiritual leaders it is a fascinating study on the importance of faithfully declaring God’s word when people don’t want to hear or obey it.

Recently I was in chapter 26.
God sends Jeremiah to the Temple to declare His message. God’s instructions are very specific to Jeremiah in that he is to give the whole message so that, “Perhaps they will listen and each will turn from his evil way. Then I will relent and not bring on them the disaster I was planning because of the evil they have done.” (v.3)
Before moving on can we be clear about this. God finds no pleasure in enacting judgment on mankind. It is his desire to see people turn from their wickedness to Him. (Ezekiel 18:23, 32, 33:11)

Jeremiah gives the message encouraging the people to obey God so that he will not have to destroy the city and the Temple. Understand that one of the prevailing thoughts of the people was that they were righteous and safe simply because they lived in God’s “holy” city and had God’s Temple. In their mind, their idolatrous actions were negated by the fact that they had the Temple to worship in. This is somewhat akin to people who go to church on Sunday to worship God then live like Satan all week.

Well, the priests and prophets don’t like Jeremiah’s message. Along with the people they decide that Jeremiah should be put to death for having the gall to declare such a message (v.7-11). Let me say that again, THE PRIESTS AND PROPHETS don’t like his message. These are the spiritual leaders! Not only should they be in agreement with the message, they should be promoting it themselves. Instead they have no ability to hear God’s word. They have no ability to discern this is God’s message. How sad! The bottom line for these leaders was expediency and self preservation. If the city and Temple fell so did their livelihood. Yet instead of pointing the people to God and leading them to follow Him they chose to keep the status quo. After all, on the outside everything was going well. There was prosperity for all. Why upset things with such a negative and unpopular message?

I am reminded of recent moves to ordain openly homosexual priests and to perform weddings for homosexual couples by both the Episcopal and Lutheran churches. These changes didn’t occur overnight. Nobody woke up last week and decided to make these moves this week. This happened over time (years) as the spiritual leaders of these bodies listened to God less and less. They discerned God’s word less and less. They grew to desire accommodation over God’s clear word. Yes, the Bible says that homosexuality is a sin (Genesis 19:4-12, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, Romans 1:24-26, Jude 1:7), but this is not my point.

What I’m saying goes beyond these two denominations. In churches everywhere the lure is for leaders to stop listening to God and start listening to the prevailing attitudes of this age. The danger is that it doesn’t just happen overnight. Slowly the voice of God gets deadened. And this is my point. This is what grabbed me. What are the things that deaden God’s voice in my own life? What thoughts, attitudes, actions do I have and participate in that slowly act as ear plugs blocking out God’s clear voice. If I’m not aware of these things then I, like the priests and prophets in Jeremiah’s day, may not even notice when I no longer hear God’s word.

It was the secular leaders, the elders and city officials who recognized God’s word. They even won the crowd over (v.16). Thank God someone heard God’s voice, it’s a shame it wasn’t the ones who were “about His business.”

No, Everybody Doesn't Go to Heaven

2009-12-13T22:07:00.006-05:00

"Daddy, does everybody go to Heaven when they die?"

Wow, where'd that one come from?

Here I am driving around taking care of business when my four year old back seat occupant asks me this question. My daughter usually carries on a discussion with herself in the back seat. I've gotten to the point where I pay little attention to it. Key words or phrases might draw me into the conversation but for the most part I stay out. I have to admit, when she raised this question I really wished I had been paying attention. What was she discussing with herself that had brought on such a question?

Every part of me wanted to say "Yes!" Call it the parental protection instinct. I wanted to describe a world where everyone is good, there is no evil, and a loving God would allow everyone into Heaven to dwell with Him for eternity. Unfortunately Genesis chapter 3 tells me otherwise. The fact is, thanks to Adam and Eve we all sin.

"No sweetie, everyone doesn't go to Heaven when they die"

"Where do they go?"

"Some people go to Heaven and some people go to Hell"

"What's Hell?"

Let me break from the story for a moment.
My wife and I have regular conversations with our daughter about God, Jesus and Heaven. She's at an age where she loves to absorb information and so she regularly brings up many subjects, including these three.
Recently I had noted that she is developing a reverence for God and even enjoys praying to Him. But I also noted that she seemed to have no concept of sin. When I discussed this with my wife she concurred. She understands "naughty" but does not equate it with "sin". The problem is, you can't have the gospel without sin. To put it another way, Jesus didn't visit earth because he had some vacation time and wanted to hang with people. He was sent by God to deal with the sin issue.
There's a bunch of verses that explain this but I'll simply use the most commonly known one, John 3:16...
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son." (John 3:16-18)

"Hell is a bad place where people go and they scream and cry because they are being burned all the time"

Silence

"Do you remember the Tom & Jerry cartoon we were watching where Tom got run over and died and he went way down in the ground and there he found a place where the dog was poking him with a fork and putting him in the burning pot and he was trying to get out?"

"Yes"

"That was Hell. It's a place where people want to get out because they are being burned."

"oh...why do people go there?"

"Because that's the punishment for sin...you know, being naughty?"

Silence

"But you know what's awesome?!"

"What?"

"That's why we love Jesus! Jesus came to take the punishment we deserved for being naughty. When you believe in Jesus and ask him to forgive you of your sins, he takes you to Heaven when you die...instead of Hell!"

Silence

The fact is, as much as I wanted to paint the prettiest most non-threatening picture that I could, I was being handed a Deuteronomy 6 moment. Sometimes we call them "teachable" moments.
"These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates." (Deuteronomy 6:6-9)

The conversation was over. I couldn't think of anything else to say, although since then I've thought of a million things I could have said. But for that time, I had said enough. After several minutes of silence her conversation with herself ensued. This time I paid attention.

"Well, this is good day. I'm so glad we learned about Hell today...I really like the church we drove by today, it had a playground...I wonder if we can go to the indoor playground this week?..."

May we as parents always recognize and never back down from "teachable" moments.

Changes

2009-12-09T17:25:00.007-05:00

Well, this blog is going through some changes as reflected by the new template and name.

When I began this blog my intention was to communicate with friends and family while preparing to make a life changing transition. I believed God was leading my family to move back to where I grew up in order to begin a new church. In an attempt to share this process with friends and family I started blogging.

After making the transition I tried to use the blog as a place for open dialogue. In the early days of meeting with the core group of Lighthouse Community Church I encouraged them to visit the blog during the week in order to interact with the content presented during our Sunday service. This did not work. Nobody participated. I would post overviews of the material along with what I considered to be thought provoking questions and nobody did a thing.

Next, I tried to utilize this site to pass along added information. Sort of like, "for further consideration...". Again, no response. I took steps to understand why there was a lack of participation by the people the forum was intended for and decided that neither of these approaches was worth continuing.

The result is that the site has languished for a while. It has been here and I've put up a post or two from time to time but it hasn't really served any purpose. I seriously thought about shutting it down. I even teamed up with a good friend and launched a new blog focused on interacting with other New England church planters here. Before I pulled the plug I decided to think through the benefits of this forum, for me. I decided that I do like having a place to share my thoughts, ideas, and passions and so I will do just that.

Lighthouse Reflections is now my place to share what's on my mind. I invite you to come on the journey with me and, as always, feel free to comment.

One Year Ago

2009-09-08T00:09:00.004-04:00

One year ago the core group of Lighthouse Community Church met for their first worship service. I don't think any of us understood the magnitude of what we were undertaking. I don't think any of us realized how big our God really is.
We were a ragtag group with "church" experience striking out to do something new, convinced that this new work is of God.
I preached a sermon called "Step Out & Step Up" from Joshua 3 which would become our theme for the year. I spoke of stepping out in terms of holiness and sanctification. Allowing God to separate you for His purposes. I spoke of stepping up to serve.
Lighthouse Community Church was like no other church the group had encountered.

Throughout the year I have watched as the group has been "stretched" in many ways by God. I have watched the group work at putting aside preferences. I have seen them take to heart the notion that Christianity is more then showing up to church on Sunday. I have seen them "drink and eat" up the Word preached to them. I have seen them work to contextualize the word and put it to practice in their lives. I have seen them put aside fear and reach out to their personal "circle of influence." They have shared their faith in love. they have ministered to one another.

I have grown. I am not the man, the husband, the father, the leader I was when I arrived. I have learned, laughed, and cried. I have had God challenge my patience, my perseverance, and my calling. I am the Pastor of Lighthouse Community Church and they are God's church, not mine. I have been entrusted with them. To lead, guide, end equip them. They are God's sheep and I am an under shepherd. I LOVE THEM!!!!!!

A year later and there are too many stories to tell. Too many "God sightings" as we call them. While there are still many uncertainties, we are certain of God's love, God's direction, and God's power!

We believe we are at ground zero of the next Great Awakening and there is no place I'd rather be.

Food for thought: Can Beats be Evil?

2009-08-14T18:34:00.000-04:00

Great post here.

Sermon Synopsis: Creation (part 1)

2009-08-03T09:48:00.002-04:00

Creation can be seen in 2 phases.
Phase one begins on day one when God creates the earth from nothing. From there He begins bringing form and order to that which was originally described as “formless and void”.
In the next phase he fills (populates) that creation with vegetation, animals, and humans.

Hebrews 11:3 helps us understand two major components of creation.
“By faith we understand that the worlds were prepared by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible.” Hebrews 11:3
1. God created “out of nothing” (ex nihilo).
2. God created by “spoken decree” (Divine Fiat)

The Biblical account is that God finished His work of creation in 6 days.
“Thus the heavens and the earth were completed in all their vast array. By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing” Genesis 2:1-2

An often overlooked point is that Everything was created with the appearance of age.
Genesis 1:11 = mature vegetation (seed bearing)
Genesis 1:21-22 = mature animals (the chicken came before the egg)
Genesis 1:28 = adult humans
What would a modern scientist conclude if he traveled back in time and arrived 10 min after man was created?
He would think that everything he saw had been there for many years (including man), when in fact it was all brand new.

A final point to consider...
Genesis 1:1 Says, “In the beginning”, the beginning of what?
Creation is not just the creation of matter, but of time itself.
Genesis 1:5 = the first designation of a solar day
Genesis 1:14 = the celestial bodies become time markers
Genesis 2:2-3 = the 7 day week is instituted
God, who transcends time, started time with creation. Furthermore, according to the bible, time as we know it will end for this earth and a “timeless” new heaven and earth will be created.

This is a portion of a sermon preached at Lighthouse Community Church of Old Saybrook, CT. You can access this sermon through L.C.C.'s website or you can directly access this sermon here.
Please feel free to interact with this material by leaving a comment.

Sermon Synopsis: "In The Beginning"

2009-07-27T11:22:00.004-04:00

Genesis 1:1
“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.”

The Bible doesn’t question God’s existence. It doesn’t try to prove God’s existence. From the very first statement of Genesis 1:1 the Bible assumes God’s existence and seeks to reveal his character, nature, and plan. Look at the following verses.

“Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God.” Psalm 90:2
“Your throne was established long ago; you are from all eternity.” Psalm 93:2
“But you remain the same, and your years will never end.” Psalm 102:27

The Bible also records God’s bold self declarations.
“God said to Moses, "I am who I am. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: 'I AM has sent me to you.' “ Exodus 3:14
"I am the Alpha and the Omega," says the Lord God, "who is, and who was, and who is to come, the Almighty.“ Revelation 1:8
God boldly asserts that He is the self existing one. He existed before time as we know it and will continue beyond time as we know it.

In summary, the testimony of the Bible is that...
1. God Knows You
1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. 5 You hem me in—behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. 7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? 8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, 10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. 11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," 12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. 13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, 16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." Psalm 139:1-16

2. You Can Know God
“The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge. There is no speech or Language where their voice is not heard. Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world.” Psalm 19:1-4
“Yet he has not left himself without testimony: He has shown kindness by giving you rain from heaven and crops in their seasons; he provides you with plenty of food and fills your hearts with joy.“ Acts 14:17
“From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us.” Acts 17:24-28
“For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.” Romans 1:20

Let me try to synthesize all of this. Starting with nature, God reveals himself to mankind. According to Psalm 19, every time you've looked at a beautiful scene from nature and thought, “This is beautiful. How did this all get here?” God was answering back, “ME! ME! ME!”
According to Acts 17, God ordered out everything in your life for the purpose of causing you to seek him. Every time you’ve ever questioned life and the “cards” you’ve been dealt it was God’s way of causing you to ask the “tough” questions of life in order to draw you closer to Him. The promise God makes is that He is not far from you.

Today, God is as close as His son Jesus who said... "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Today you can place your faith in Christ and have a personal relationship with the very God who created you. It’s as easy as A. B. C.
A - Admit that you are a sinner who can do nothing to save yourself.
B - Believe that Christ died for your sins on the cross. (Acts 16:31)
C - Call on Christ in prayer and asking him to save you. (Romans 10:9-10, 13)

This is a portion of a sermon preached at Lighthouse Community Church of Old Saybrook, CT. You can access this sermon through L.C.C.'s website or you can directly access this sermon at here.
Please feel free to interact with this material by leaving a comment.

African Americans & Michael Jackson

2009-06-29T23:33:00.003-04:00

Powerful remarks by a dear Pastor whom I look up to.
Click here.

Pray for The Ambassador

2009-06-13T10:22:00.003-04:00

Sad news in the world of Christian Hip-Hop...(story here)

I have been a long time supporter of The Ambassador and The cross Movement. Therefore the recent news of William Branch's marital infidelity are a crushing blow. It is a sober reminder that going to Bible College, Seminary, and being a Pastor do not guarantee a lack of sinful failure. The fact is, those things make you more susceptible to Satan's attacks.

I am glad that he is repentant and willing to submit to local church discipline. I am also glad that The Cross Movement has kept their integrity by dealing with the issue in a straightforward and biblical manner. I know this is not easy for them as they are in the position of having to separate from one of their founders.

Finally, pray for "Duece" and his family. He now faces a long uphill climb. Keep his wife and children in your prayers and remember the words of Paul in Galatians 6:1-5.

"1. Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. 2. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 3. If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. 4. Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, 5. for each one should carry his own load."

Active Waiting

2009-06-02T16:34:00.002-04:00

"In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice. In the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation." Psalm 5:3

"I wait for you, O LORD; you will answer, O Lord my God." Psalm 38:15

"but those who wait on the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

When we think of waiting we think of it as a passive passing of time.
Yet I believe we are called to be active as we wait.
Here are four things Henry Blackaby says we can do to occupy our time.
1. Pray - Pray with passion, belief and expectancy. Pray to know God and His purposes.
2. Watch - Watch circumstances and ask God to reveal Himself in them. Seek His interpretation of life events.
3. Share - Share what is on your heart to other believers and listen as God speaks through them to reveal greater perspective.
4. Do - Do the last thing God clearly told you to do.

I believe Matthew 7:7-8 says it best, ASK-SEEK-KNOCK!

Please Tweet In Church

2009-05-04T18:41:00.004-04:00

This post is based on the following article and my personal use of Twitter.

For those who don't know what Twitter is, it is a platform that allows you to update people on your activities in real time. What's great about it is that it crosses platforms. Currently, I can send a text message from my phone that is instantly displayed on my Twitter site, my Facebook site, and this blog. (Check the right column)

I know, I know, who cares what I'm up to throughout the day?!

However, from day one I have always encouraged interaction at Lighthouse Community Church. I encourage people to interact with me while I preach, and I used to do a follow-up blog each week in which I encouraged people to further interact with the subject matter. The problem is that there are not many tech savvy people currently at L.C.C. In fact, there's a bit of tech distrust and ignorance. Regardless, I push on.

I think it would be great to have someone monitoring Twitter in real time (btw, I can do this with my Blackberry) while I'm preaching. Questions can then be discussed immediately or, at the very least, I could take some time at the end of the sermon to review some questions. This allows people to leave with a clearer understanding and for me to know that I have effectively communicated the message.

Think about it and interact here on this board.
Is this a good thing?
How could it be implemented?
How do we move "scared" or "ignorant" people to utilize a new platform?

Good Soil

2009-04-15T08:40:00.002-04:00

1That same day Jesus went out of the house and sat by the lake. 2Such large crowds gathered around him that he got into a boat and sat in it, while all the people stood on the shore. 3Then he told them many things in parables, saying: "A farmer went out to sow his seed. 4As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. 5Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. 6But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. 7Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. 8Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop—a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown. 9He who has ears, let him hear." ...
18"Listen then to what the parable of the sower means: 19When anyone hears the message about the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. This is the seed sown along the path. 20The one who received the seed that fell on rocky places is the man who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. 21But since he has no root, he lasts only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, he quickly falls away. 22The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful. 23But the one who received the seed that fell on good soil is the man who hears the word and understands it. He produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown." (Mt 13:1-9, 18-23)

A lot of seed was sown this past weekend. God showed up in an amazing way and many lives were blessed. My abiding prayer is that all the seed that was sown will fall on deep fertile soil. Imagine the impact L.C.C. could have for many years to come if it's people were producing crops of 30, 60, 100 times what was sown.

Countdown!

2009-04-07T18:00:00.003-04:00

This Sunday our church Launches!
We will officially have our first service that's "open" to the public.
We are calling it our...
GRAND OPENING SERVICE!
Very original.

A few things I've learned so far.
Assisting with a church plant is nothing like leading one.
God is ALWAYS at work.
God almost never answers prayer in my time or in my way. (Thank the Lord)
God has truly blessed me with an amazing wife!!!!!!!!!
Sometimes I spend too much time trying NOT be someone or something instead of simply being what God wants me to be.
It is a blessing to see God working in people's lives.

Pray for us as we are led by God to impact our community.
As usual, on the eve of something big I find God working overtime in my own life.

"Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the LORD will do amazing things among you."
Joshua 3:5

Shankopotamus!

2009-02-05T23:07:00.001-05:00

I Can't Flex the Golden Pipes?

2009-02-05T22:57:00.001-05:00

Shared Ministry (part 1)

2009-01-29T21:45:00.001-05:00

Acts 6:1-4
In those days when the number of disciples was increasing, the Grecian Jews among them complained against the Hebraic Jews because their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food. So the Twelve gathered all the disciples together and said, "It would not be right for us to neglect the ministry of the word of God in order to wait on tables. Brothers, choose seven men from among you who are known to be full of the Spirit and wisdom. We will turn this responsibility over to them and will give our attention to prayer and the ministry of the word."

It has been debated whether or not the seven men chosen in this passage were the first Deacons. What cannot be debated is that the Apostles were adamant about keeping first things first. The priority of their ministry was prayer and the Word.

We live in a day and age where methodology rules. Where leadership, even in the church, is defined by “moving” people. Where style rules over substance and everyone sells their “secrets” to making church work. As a church planter I can pick up book after book on church planting without finding one that encourages me to keep my primary focus on the ministry of the Word. Yet, this is what the first church planters did. In doing so they brought focus to both the leadership and the members. In essence, everyone was to be active and responsibility was to be distributed.

I have recently made the move to being a bi-vocational minister. I am the Pastor of Lighthouse Community Church and have also taken another full-time position. The biggest effect this has had on me is to bring greater focus to my priorities. I can’t work full-time, be a good husband, be a good father, and do everything for the church. However, I can work, be a good husband, be a good father, and be an excellent minister. The subtle but important difference is realized in my focus. I can’t do everything for the church. I’m not called to do everything for the church. What I can do is foster an atmosphere of shared ministry while focusing on prayer and the ministry of the Word.

As a church, my new job has presented a challenge. Will each individual “step up” and take ownership of this ministry? If I share responsibility, will we accept responsibility? Will we live by the 80/20 rule and allow 20% of our group to do 80% of the work?

We are at a very pivotal stage as we prepare for our spring launch. I am convinced God has presented this challenge at this time to prepare us for a major movement of God on our behalf. The question is, will we move as He is directing us?

When the Church Prays (Part 2)

2009-01-20T22:37:00.001-05:00

When the Church Prays (part 1)

2009-01-13T19:15:00.003-05:00

New Year, New Clothes!

2009-01-06T22:09:00.003-05:00

Colossians 3:1-14

I'm not a big fan of makeover shows. However, there is one that has grown on me, TLC's "What Not to Wear". Each episode features fashion experts Stacy London and Clinton Kelly paying surprise visits to some poor unsuspecting soul at the behest of their friends, family, and co-workers. After revealing all of the "victim's" fashion faux pas they offer a deal. The "victim" can have $5000 for a new wardrobe if they are willing to follow the tutelage of the experts AND throw away their current wardrobe.

This show is what goes through my mind when I read Colossians chapter 3.

Verses 1-4 provide the mindset that the believer ought to have. We'll call it the tutelage...
"Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory."

Verses 5-11 describe the things you should be eliminating from your life. We'll call it the old wardrobe...
"Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all."

Finally, verses 12-14 show us the new clothes we should be putting on, our new wardrobe.
"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."

On the TV show I spoke of an amazing transformation takes place. The "victim" initially fights the experts but soon changes. As they see themselves in their new clothes they see themselves for what they really are. They see their own true beauty. They stop fighting the experts, stop looking at themselves as victims, and they blossom.

As we head into the new year let's take some heavenly advice on how to process life. Let's throw out out our old wardrobe, and let's enjoy the new wardrobe we have been given. Given some time you just may look in the mirror and be surprised at what you see. The true you may come shining through as you live out the reality of 2 Corinthians 5:17.
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!"

The Body

2008-11-17T11:21:00.002-05:00

Things have been so busy with LCC that it's been a while since I had a minute to sit and record some thoughts. LCC determined that instead of making plans and asking god to bless them we'd discern where God is at work and join Him. (John 5:17 - Thanks Blackaby!) The result has been overwhelming and as a result I have been very busy.

Recently we have been considering the church. We've discussed it in various settings culminating in a sermon I preached this past Sunday. 1 Corinthians 12:12-26 is a powerful passage. The verses that have effected us the most have been verse 21..."The eye cannot say to the hand, "I don't need you!" And the head cannot say to the feet, "I don't need you!"... and verse 26..."If one part suffers, every part suffers with it. How often do we consider this?
If you've been around church for any length of time you've experienced church splits. Even if you haven't experienced a split you have probably known times when someone chooses to leave the church. Unfortunately too often when this happens the mindset is that "they" have a problem and everyone is better off with "them" gone.
The fact is, we use the case of Paul and Barnabas to rationalize a lot of division in the church. Yet, in 1 Corinthians God says that God disperses special honor upon some of the body parts..."so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other."
It's been my experience that too often we disregard this. We strive for uniformity (everyone needs to look and act the same) instead of unity (we are all different and have different functions but come together under a common purpose and goal). When someone doesn't fit our mold, asks the wrong questions, doesn't act or look like us, we are quick to cast them aside instead of bestowing greater honor and having equal concern.

LCC is doing something that you will never find in a manual on church planting or church growth. LCC is launching an effort to reach out to people who have made professions of faith but are not actively involved in a church.
Some of them may be people that have been hurt by their previous church experience and are disenfranchised with the church. Some may be people who may have gone astray in their walk with God. Some of them may have even made false professions of faith.
Regardless, we are reaching out to them and letting them know that we are suffering without them. The body of Christ, universal and local, is suffering. We need them and they need us. LCC is offering a safe place to reconnect with the body and be fed by God's word.

Please pray for us! This is one of those things where we have seen God at work in some lives and want to jump on board with what he is doing.

By the way, if you are in CT and profess faith in Christ and are not actively serving in a church, please join us. Visit our web page and find out where we worship and click on the link titled...Homecoming.

Marriage

2008-10-18T00:12:00.003-04:00

As a follow-up to my recent sermon on marriage and family, check this out.

Passion in Prayer.

2008-10-08T13:58:00.003-04:00

Acts 12:1-19
1.It was about this time that King Herod arrested some who belonged to the church, intending to persecute them.
2.He had James, the brother of John, put to death with the sword.
3.When he saw that this pleased the Jews, he proceeded to seize Peter also. This happened during the Feast of Unleavened Bread.
4.After arresting him, he put him in prison, handing him over to be guarded by four squads of four soldiers each. Herod intended to bring him out for public trial after the Passover.
5.So Peter was kept in prison, but the church was earnestly praying to God for him.
6.The night before Herod was to bring him to trial, Peter was sleeping between two soldiers, bound with two chains, and sentries stood guard at the entrance.
7.Suddenly an angel of the Lord appeared and a light shone in the cell. He struck Peter on the side and woke him up. "Quick, get up!" he said, and the chains fell off Peter's wrists.
8.Then the angel said to him, "Put on your clothes and sandals." And Peter did so. "Wrap your cloak around you and follow me," the angel told him.
9.Peter followed him out of the prison, but he had no idea that what the angel was doing was really happening; he thought he was seeing a vision.
10.They passed the first and second guards and came to the iron gate leading to the city. It opened for them by itself, and they went through it. When they had walked the length of one street, suddenly the angel left him.
11.Then Peter came to himself and said, "Now I know without a doubt that the Lord sent his angel and rescued me from Herod's clutches and from everything the Jewish people were anticipating."
12.When this had dawned on him, he went to the house of Mary the mother of John, also called Mark, where many people had gathered and were praying.
13.Peter knocked at the outer entrance, and a servant girl named Rhoda came to answer the door.
14.When she recognized Peter's voice, she was so overjoyed she ran back without opening it and exclaimed, "Peter is at the door!"
15."You're out of your mind," they told her. When she kept insisting that it was so, they said, "It must be his angel."
16.But Peter kept on knocking, and when they opened the door and saw him, they were astonished.
17.Peter motioned with his hand for them to be quiet and described how the Lord had brought him out of prison. "Tell James and the brothers about this," he said, and then he left for another place.
18.In the morning, there was no small commotion among the soldiers as to what had become of Peter.
19.After Herod had a thorough search made for him and did not find him, he cross-examined the guards and ordered that they be executed.

James 5:16B-18
16b.The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
17.Elijah was a man just like us. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years.
18.Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops.

Recently I have been re-examining some familiar scripture passages in a new light.
I have those passages above. The first is the miraculous account of Peter being freed from prison.
If you're like me you've heard plenty of sermons on this passage. Those sermons usually highlight the unbelief of those praying for Peter. Their prayer was answered and they didn't believe it to be true.

The second passage is from the book of James and usually when I hear this taught the stress is on righteousness. In essence, when we have cleaned up our life we can approach God confidently. After all, the preceding verses speak of confessing sin one to another.

If you read the above passages, I highlighted what has stuck out to me recently. I will summarize both with the word "Passion". In both cases I believe one of the key reasons these prayers are effective was because of the passion of the one praying. By passion I don't mean emotion, I mean perseverance. I mean repeatedly going to God. Both passages use the word "earnest".

We often want to put Elijah on a pedestal and believe that his super "Christianity" enabled him to see God answer his prayers. It seems to me that his passion for prayer was just as important to God. He was after all, just like us. (According to the passage)
In the Acts passage we often surmise that it was their corporate gathering that moved God to answer prayer. It seems to me that it was their passion.

This all seems to align with Jesus' teachings in Luke 18:1-8. Check it out...
"Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. He said: "In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men. And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.' "For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, 'Even though I don't fear God or care about men,yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won't eventually wear me out with her coming!' " And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?"

God seeks to answer our prayers quickly BUT he also wants us to come to him repeatedly. This rubs against us and our self-help mindset. I need to continually admit that I need God. I need to go to him every day and ask him for his work in my life. This is FAITH! (According to Luke 18:8)

Being the Answer to Your Own Prayer

2008-09-25T08:28:00.002-04:00

"Do you not say, 'Four months more and then the harvest'? I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for harvest." Jn 4:35

"When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field." Matt 9:36-38

Jesus spent a lot of time focusing his disciples on God's agenda. I call this a divine perspective. As an under shepherd of God's flock I am always asking God to give me a clear "divine perspective" on everything. I am always asking him to "Open MY eyes!"

I find it interesting that in the Matthew passage above Jesus' purpose in directing the disciples to pray was so that they would become the answer to their prayer. I wonder how many of them actually prayed. Or to put it another way, how many of them said, "Yeah Jesus, I'll pray about that" then went about their business.

It would seem that the answer to my question is that Jesus would not allow them to do so. In the very next verses he commissions them to go out and begin harvesting. He told them to pray so that they would see that they were the very answer to the prayer. How often do we see that? How often do we pray for something or someone without seeing that God wants us to be the answer to our prayers?

James put it another way,
"Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it?" James 2:15-16

It's much more convenient to pray for our brothers and sisters in need then to act on their behalf. Or to be more specific, it's much easier to "partner in prayer" then to actually do something.

When I share the vision and work of Lighthouse Community Church with others I always inform them of the ways they can partner with us. We are in the stage where our biggest need is financial partnerships but without minimizing that need I always share the importance of prayer partnerships.
Today I wonder out loud if any of our prayer partners have ever thought of being the answer to their prayers for us?

The Bible

2008-09-14T21:38:00.004-04:00

Today we took a straight forward look at Scripture.

What are the obstacles you face in being diligent about reading and studying Scripture?

Why does it seem easier to read the latest Christian self help book then the Bible itself?

The Psalmist said that God's word was a lamp to his feet and a light to his path. As American Christians we are content to allocate that responsibility to someone else. We are content to go to church and hear someone speak about the Bible for 20-45 minutes. We exercise little discernment about what is being taught. We really aren't paying that much attention beyond 30 min. But as long as we get a warm fuzzy feeling we think everything is fine. We think we have done our duty. In reality we've really just soothed our conscience.

I'm not immune to this. As someone who enjoys reading it's very easy for me to spend all my time reading books and not the Bible. It's easy for me to get caught up in the latest book by someone who grew their church from 10 to 10,000 people. It's easy to elevate the latest ministry model.

The bottom line is that as a Pastor I am not a program manager!
I am not an event coordinator!
I am called to make disciples and to equip the church to be disciple makers!
If I follow the model of Jesus I will place a high value on Scripture and I will understand that real life relationships are the fertile ground for growth.

First Worship Service

2008-09-07T22:29:00.002-04:00

What areas do you hold back from God?

When I was a Youth Pastor in MD God challenged me with Joshua's words in Josh 3:5.
He tells the people to consecrate themselves because God is about to do something amazing. I was reminded that my top priority was not to create and maintain programs but to grow in my walk with God. As I did this the events of ministry took care of themselves and I truly saw God do amazing things in the lives of the youth.

Today I challenged the members of Lighthouse to do the same, to consecrate themselves.
Our ministry theme for 08-09 is "Step Out & Step Up".
We look forward to the amazing things God is going to do through this ministry in the days to come.

20 people came out for our first core group worship service. You can hear my sermon on our podcast page. Click on the link on the right side of the page.

Lighthouse is Legit

2008-09-01T10:58:00.004-04:00

Yesterday Lighthouse Community Church had its Formation service.
In essence, we were voted into existence. We are now "real".

Twelve people gathered for dinner after which the Pastor of our sponsor church, Third Baptist Church of North Stonington, called a business meeting to order.
Pastor Rick explained to everyone that the point of the meeting was to bring Lighthouse into existence as a missionary arm of Third Baptist.
A church Clerk and Treasurer were voted on.
Founding members were voted on.
Finally, a Pastor was called.

There are times when the magnitude of the moment doesn't hit until later. Entering the meeting I was excited about the fact that it was a historical moment. I wondered what God will do with this church in the years to come. I prayed that it would always be a place that honored Him. As the meal progressed it was full of our usual banter. The core group knows one another well and joked about everything from UCONN football tickets to a church sponsored wave runner for use on the CT river. As the meeting was called to order I found myself wanting to make sure everyone understood what was happening. When I was called as the Pastor I looked at each of the people voting for me and realized that I was the answer to their prayers. Think about it. Here were people that have been praying for several years that God would bring somebody to the area to lead a new ministry.

When I went to bed I was hit with the full force. I had just been called to Pastor these people. To shepherd and guide them. To love them enough to give my life for them. Hebrews 13:17 says...
"Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they keep watch over your souls as those who will give an account."
While my church experience growing up always stressed the "obedience" part, God has been stressing the "keep watch" part to me. Will I dedicate myself to watching over their souls? Pastors are many things and they do many things but how many of us can look at the leadership in our church and say that we know the bottom line is they care for us so much that we know they watch over our souls?

It's hard to sleep when you know you have 12 souls to watch over.
In some small way I felt what Solomon felt when he became king at a young age and all he could do was go to God and ask for wisdom.

Lighthouse is legit. It is God's work and I'm just an under-shepherd but I desperately need wisdom and I desperately need your prayers every day.

Above : Pastor Rick Pressley of Third Baptiust Church of North Stonington
Below : The Core Group

August

2008-08-04T10:17:00.003-04:00

Thank you to all who came out on Saturday. We witnessed the power of God as he suspended the rain for 2 hours and allowed us to fire up the grill and have a great time of fellowship outside.

Speaking of "fired up", everyone was so fired up by the presentation that I am exploring ways to put it in a format that can be distributed to those that were unable to attend.
We had 13 people that were unable to attend. Consider the movement we could spark if we add those 13 to the 12 that did come out?

The point of this post is to review some of the things we discussed in moving forward for the remainder of this month.

"House of Prayer"
This will be held on Tuesday evenings in August.
We will meet at the Acton Public Library in Old Saybrook at 7pm.
They have conference rooms on the second floor where we will meet to have a time of praise and prayer.

"Table Talk"
This will be held on Thursdays in August.
I will be at Starbucks in Old Saybrook from 7-9pm.
Feel free to stop in and ask me any questions you have about the Bible, church, or this ministry.
In order to get you thinking, I've recommended 2 books on the right side of this blog page. "Church an Insiders Look" and "Rethinking Church" are excellent books that challenge us to think about how and why we do things. They are both paperback and quick reads.
Remember, table talk is about discussion. I don't necessarily endorse everything put forward in these books but they certainly provide a platform for discussion.

As I mentioned on Saturday, I have been invited to preach at Huntington Street Baptist Church in New London on Sun August 24th. I would love to have as many of you as possible go with me. I will confirm the time for this and we can plan a carpool.

Finally, keep the other CT church plants in your prayers. The pics you see below are of Brian Hart and the Oakdale core group. Their church, Chapel Hill Community Church is scheduled to launch publicly at the end of October. Lets be sure to saturate them with our prayers and once I have confirmed the date maybe we can carpool up and be a part of that day.

Sunday, July 20th

2008-07-17T10:51:00.002-04:00

Lighthouse Community Core Group Members...
I'd like to invite you to join me for an opportunity to connect with our sponsor church and the other CT church planters this coming Sunday.
Third Baptist Church of North Stonington will be having their morning worship service at 10am. Rev. Brian Hart will be delivering the message. Brian is a good friend of mine and is the church planter in Oakdale.
I will be attending this service and I invite all Lighthouse core groupers to join me. We can meet at my place at 9am and carpool to Third Baptist.

Let me know if you plan to join us.

Be Blessed!

2008-07-11T16:25:00.002-04:00

I love sharing things that are a blessing to me.

The gentleman that took over as Youth director of the church we just left in MD sent me this report on a community basketball outreach they had this week.

The church is located next to an apartment complex (Carriage Hill) and we have been strategizing ways to reach the children living there for over a year. This was our first big event and THANK GOD for what HE DID!

Here's the report...
The basketball outreach was amazing we had about 25 kids from Carriage Hill and a few from Colonial. This was such a God moment because a hour before the event the skies opened up and rain poured down like you wouldn't believe. I stood out back trying to determine whether or not I was going to setup the goals. Then I remembered that God called me to be obedient to His will so we decide to go ahead as planned. Would you know it the ground dried up and we had three courts going at once (got other 2 goals from embrace).

The missions team presented the gospel and we had 12 young people give their lives to Christ. It just shows that God wants obedience!!!!

God is awesome and note how he used a willing church and a visiting ministry team.

Saying Farewell to the Anderson Brothers

2008-07-10T15:29:00.002-04:00

I met Robert Anderson Jr. in 1997. At the time I was a student at Baptist Bible College in PA. We became friends and when I moved to MD in 2002 my wife and I became members of Colonial Baptist Church, where he pastors. He is a friend and mentor and serving along side him as the Youth Pastor of Colonial for the past year has been an honor and a privilege.

David Anderson is Robert's little brother. David pastors Bridgeway Community Church in Columbia, MD. I first heard of David through his brother.
Robert and I were discussing a racial reconciliation consulting ministry that I had started while at BBC. Robert mentioned that his brother David had such a ministry which led me to visit David's church several times and listen to a radio program he hosted.
In 2005, after being involved in a church plant, I shared with Robert that I thought God was leading me to be a church planter and that I thought I would lead a multicultural church plant. He instantly encouraged me to start attending David's church so that I could see this type of ministry first hand. My family attended Bridgeway Community Church for almost 2 years before returning to Colonial Baptist as it's Youth Pastor.
During my time at Bridgeway, David was a model of compassionate ministry and reaching out to ones community. His testimony is powerful as he grew up dealing with racism and allowed God to shape a heart for biblical racial reconciliation.

Last week I said goodbye to both of them. I know I will see them both again. They both look forward to seeing Lighthouse Community Church grow. But, I write this to say that they and their family are a powerful example of how God can touch many lives through a family dedicated to serving him.

I pray for both of them every day and look forward to seeing them again soon.

We have arrived in CT

2008-07-10T12:48:00.000-04:00

More to come when I have a moment.

Extended Core

2008-06-30T21:44:00.005-04:00

I'm going to do a 2 part series I'm calling Lighthouse Community's Extended Core.

The "Extended Core" is comprised of some of our deepest friends. These are people that Mary and I have lived life with in the ten years that we've been married. We've laughed, cried and shared life changing moments together. We've also studied and talked "ministry" many times over and today we are all involved in ministry in some form or fashion.

Many of these families were told about Lighthouse Community 3 years ago when we first felt God was leading us to return to CT. They have prayed with us through each step. They have considered their own involvement and therefore will someday appear in CT to minister with us either short or long term.

I think it's important for those of you in CT to know that you are being prayed for on a regular basis. This ministry has had supporters for almost three years. Long before we knew where in CT we'd land or what the nature of the ministry would be these have been the people holding us and this ministry up before the Lord.

The point is to put a face to these people. To let you see them. In time I will do the same for them. I will share pictures of you with them. Here they are...

The Hecks
This is Brian, Pam and Riley.
They currently live in FL. Before God moved on us to go to CT we were planning to go to FL to live near them.
Brian is a CT native who is a teacher in a Christian school.
Pam is a MD native who is a counselor.
We've known them since 1997 and I had the honor of marrying them.
Brian is like the son my mother has always wanted to disown.

The Martinos
Matt and Susanna live in Salisbury, MD.
Matt was smart enough to leave being a Christian school teacher.
Matt is the best friend I almost didn't have. (long story)
They pray for us often, always stop by when they're in town, and look forward to making their way to the northeast to meet everyone at Lighthouse and go to Yankee Stadium.

The McCanns
Nate, Jenna, and Josiah currently live in Louisville, KY where Nate is working on his Masters degree.
Nate's like the son I haven't had yet. In other words he thinks he's smarter then he is and never does what I tell him to do.
Seriously, Nate has a huge heart to come and minister at Lighthouse and I look forward to him finishing his schooling and joining us.

So that's three families. I'll add 3 more when I have a minute.

We need to check our own preferences at the door.

2008-06-26T21:35:00.002-04:00

Please read the post entitled "God Hates Visionary Dreaming" on my buddy Rob's blog. Especially if you are in CT and plan to be involved with Lighthouse Community.

Rob's been a church planter and will be one again.

Let me know what you think of his post either here or by email.

Make the Most of Your Time Here

2008-06-25T11:31:00.002-04:00

"Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is." Eph 5:15-17

I was shocked last night when I heard the news that a former college professor of mine died unexpectedly on Sunday. He was only 53 years old. He went to bed on Sat and woke up in Heaven on Sunday morning. More here.

He was one of the main reasons I came to MD. In 2001 I was looking at different seminaries to see where I would work on my Master's Degree and he pointed out Capital Seminary in Lanham, MD. I had never heard of it but he told me how good the school is. He had been a Pastor in Laurel, MD for over 10 years and had gotten his degree from Capital. He also told me that I would fall in love with MD when I got here and he was right about that as well.

His death is a reminder that you don't know how long you have on this earth. He was in perfect health and nobody, including him, expected God to call him home at this time. The words of Ephesians 5:15-17 have been in my mind all night. Do I live my life with purpose? Do I take advantage of each moment I have here on earth or do I waste time and opportunities? I pray that all of those who take on the name of Christ would truly live with purpose like he did.

THE BIG NEWS!

2008-06-20T16:32:00.002-04:00

Ok...most of you have gotten this in bits and pieces but here it is all layed out for you.

As we ended May and headed into June the CT relo was in question.
The hard financial numbers had come in from the SBC and they weren’t good.
Neither of us had secured a job and we were headed into a mortgage that I wasn’t sure we could secure much less pay each month.

We stepped back and re-examined the picture. With offers on the table to stay in MD we needed to be sure now was the time to move forward with CT. We spent a lot of time in prayer and fasting. We examined what we believed to be God’s calling us back to CT. We re-examined timing issues. In the end we were in agreement that now was the time to move forward.

Now we focused on the best way to move forward. Clearly taking on this mortgage was not the best thing to do at this time. Too bad, it was a beautiful house, oh well. I’ve never wavered about God’s ability to provide but I wasn’t excited about the alternatives.

We could rent but Mary had been pretty adamant against that all along. About a month earlier my mother had shared that she felt led by God to offer to let us stay at my parents while we got back on track. I thanked her but felt that I’m not “that guy.” You know, the one that returns home to mom and dad. I had left home 10 years ago with no intention of returning and certainly not with my wife and child.

We prayed some more. Selling our house was no longer an option but God quickly provided a great management company and friends to assist us in our new role as Landlords. As of today we are about to sign a lease with a woman. Please pray that God will supply her needs and allow her pay her rent on time each month.

As we prayed God said something…prayer is not about getting God aligned to my agenda it’s about aligning myself with His. Hmmmm…had to swallow my pride. Staying at my parents would allow us to live in our new financial paradigm. And best of all Mary wouldn’t have to go to work (something I had been praying about for almost 5 years). Then Mary shared that she was open to renting.

So, now we were on the same page and best of all it was God’s page. I called my real estate agent and she masterfully backed us out of buying the house. At the same time my church wanted to lock down their financial support offer. I was receiving call backs for job opportunities. God moves quick when we’re on board with Him!

The plan is to go to CT and stay at my parents until we get a rent then look to buy a house next year once I have more financial stability.

July 7th we leave MD and relocate to CT.

As of today we are talking with a lady who owns a house off Main St in Old Saybrook who is looking to rent it for a year or two. The rent she’s looking for is a bit high but she is willing to talk if we tell her what we can afford.
As of today my church has finalized their support package. It’s a great start and they’ll look to re assess it for 09 as they head into budget season in the fall.

Still need a few more churches to get on board. Pray for one in particular. They visited in Dec. They have been supporting some of the other church plants in CT and are looking to meet next week to come on board with us. That would be a big one.
Bottom line as of today…I have to raise $1000 of monthly support on my own before another $1200 will be kicked in from the SBC. That gives us a minimum to move forward but I will still need more as we move into the fall and 09.

Want to give? Email me. One time gifts, $10, $15, $20 a month, we’ll make it work.

God is good!

No job yet but may not need it if the support comes in. Still applied to Verizon Wireless yesterday. Nate, you never texted me back.

God is good!

My Dad : Update

2008-06-19T17:21:00.003-04:00

Many of you know that my dad has spent the past year battling various life threatening health issues. He only has one kidney and due to the stress of all of these issues it stopped functioning.

Today at 4pm my mother called to tell me that Yale Hospital in New Haven, CT called to say they have a matching kidney and would like to perform a transplant.

This is a blessing but is not without it's hazards.

Please pray for the doctors and nurses who will attend to him.
Please pray that his body will respond and he will regain his health.
Please pray for my mother.
Please pray that God will be glorified in all the happens.

Thank you.

It looks like the kidney was not a match.
Pray that this does not become a trend and that a suitable match is found soon.

5 Min to Bless your heart.

2008-06-09T16:06:00.001-04:00

Check out the youth choir of Colonial Baptist singing on the podcast.

This is not the BIG news

2008-06-09T13:41:00.006-04:00

But it does relate to it.

Let me start by talking about my physically and emotionally exhausting weekend.

I did nothing on Friday because I had been running at a maddening pace all week and knew this weekend would be overwhelming. On Sat afternoon I was at Youth Choir rehearsal as we worked to put a wrinkle in one of their songs in preparation for Sunday's service. From there we had our annual Graduation banquet for our youth. It was very emotional as two of our youth recently lost their father and we were also announcing a new scholarship we're making available in honor of the death of one of our youth in a terrible accident two years ago. Her family was there and spoke and as I said it was powerfully emotional. We finished the night by heading into the city to meet up with Mary's brother Paul who is in town.

Sunday was our first Youth Day service. The youth were in charge of planning and executing the whole thing. Our Pastor is out of town for the annual Southern Baptist Convention so I was in charge of EVERYTHING. Thank God for BARRY! The man did his best to keep me focused on my sermon while he orchestrated the affair. I had a "tough" sermon to give. One of those where you share your heart about things that just aren't right. I will post the 11am version on my podcast page later today. The service was a bit bumpy at 8am but God still used everything to prepare people for the message. When I gave the sermon it was one where you knew at times people were with you and at other times you had stepped on some toes. I was calling for a revival and at the end I challenged the men to spark revival in their families by leading them forward for a time of re-dedication and prayer. Those who know me now this is not my normal Modus operandi . I'm not an invitation type of preacher but I knew people needed to be challenged to take action immediately.
The response was overwhelming. All over the sanctuary men were grabbing their wives and children and coming to the front. I greeted and thanked people for over 10 min before leading them all in a pray. By the time I prayed I had broken down and was crying. I remembered how I had sat in the parking lot earlier in the morning praying that to God that I wanted to visibly see him at work in the service. Here was the answer. My sermon had been about the way we view youth ministry and people had gotten the message and responded as God would have them. It was humbling and powerful. My final words to them as they all stood at "the altar" was "This is youth ministry...not me...families...God using parents to guide their children"

That was the 8am, where do you go from there? The 11am service had several more elements added including a "remixed" version of the youth choir's signature song, Rock of Ages. Understand, the kids are sick of the song. It's an updated version of the hymn that has been the youth choir staple for years. When I asked them to sing it I faced mutiny on the bounty. But I promised them I had a great idea on how to kick it up a notch. One of our young adults is a hip-hop artist. He was on our panel when we had our hip-hop summit. I asked him to write a rhyme for the song and lead it. When the time came he grabbed the mic and got the people on their feet. They went into the song and after 2 verses he kicked it. The people, already on their feet, were moving. When he end and the choir came back in they were at a part where they usually bob and weave their shoulders. Everyone in the place was bobbing and weaving with them while Jonathan the rapper was going up and down the isle praising Jesus. Barry and I were standing in the front row hootin, hollerin, and pumping our fists. It was great. I only wish my mom and dad could have been there. Mom would be trying to clap on the right beat and dad would be sitting in his seat...hahaha
When it was sermon time I again found people responsive. Many came forward at the end.

Immediately after church we had a lunch and ring ceremony for those who had participated in our "True Love Waits" sexual purity program. Again I spoke and again it was powerful to see youth make purity commitments and parents to make commitments about the example they would be. I challenged them that the power of a commitment comes when it's tested not when it's spoken.

I got home with 2 hours to nap before heading back to the church for our young adult service. This is actually why I started to write today. I am proud of the young adults of my church. All winter they talked about starting their own worship service. They found that their 2 biggest impediments to worship were work and service. Either they had to work during the day and couldn't make morning services or they were so busy serving in various ministries on Sunday morning that they felt like they has missed their opportunity to be fed. So staring last week they now meet the first three Sundays of every month and have a worship service. You can visit their web page here. I am currently doing a series called Moving Forward with them which you can listen to on their podcast page.

Finally, I tendered my resignation this morning and broke the news on our youth blog. When I actually post, THE BIG NEWS, I will go into detail about the status of our relocation. But that's it for now.

That's it for now.

Big News Coming Soon!

2008-05-29T11:18:00.003-04:00

And it's good!

In the meantime chew on this...
And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. This, then, is how you should pray:
"Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven."
Mt 6:7-10

Someone has said that prayer is not about moving God onto our agenda rather it's about aligning us with his will.

Verse of the Week

2008-05-19T17:46:00.003-04:00

Then Joshua told the people,
“Purify yourselves, for tomorrow the Lord will do great wonders among you.”
Josh 3:5 NLT

So often we want God to do for us without acknowledging what He desires from us.

Exciting Times

2008-05-08T09:19:00.002-04:00

This week we shifted our focus to renting our MD home.
A couple of weeks ago a neighbor of ours listed their house for $15k less then us. This has had the effect of causing others to drop their prices as well. If we drop below our list price we will make nothing on the sale.
However, there is a strong rental market because housing demand in this area is very high. Since people can't get mortgages they have to rent instead. We have signed on with a management company and hope to get a signed lease on the next 3 weeks. Pray that we get a good tenant.

Meanwhile we are still scheduled to close on the CT house on June 30 and will be in CT for Memorial Day weekend.

As for Lighthouse Community, the church name has temporarily been accepted by the state as our application is in process. We will be opening an account with the bank soon which will allow us to get our EIN number and apply for our non-profit status.

I am also setting up a webpage and will have it ready in early June.

We also have some ministry teams that want to come visit us this summer to help s in our efforts to spread the word and gain visibility in the community.

Clearly God is at work and we are excited.

Updates

2008-05-07T09:49:00.003-04:00

Updated my music and reading segments.
Yes, two of the albums I'm listening to regularly are children's albums. Every time I get into the car with my daughter these albums play over and over and over. If I dare to change the music I hear, "No I don't wanna listen to this CD" from the back seat.

As for the books...
The First book I list, "Church: An Insider's Look" is REALLY thought provoking. The author has clearly been around church for a long time. The book drips with sarcasm and poignant thoughts. It really is a must read for church goers and leaders.

The second book is also a great read for both leaders and members. It is about ministry. It will actually form the outline I plan to use when studying the subject with the core group of Lighthouse Community Church. The idea is that we should all be engaged in ministry but we also need to keep certain things in mind as we minister to one another. This is a book that provides focus and tries to keep people from getting burned out.

The third book is part of my personal "Marriage" series. Each year I try to read a book on marriage. Last year I read two books, "For Women Only" and "For Men Only" by Shaunti Feldhan. In my mind those books are the current standard for assisting couples that have been married a while.
This book, "Saving Your Marriage", asks 7 very good questions that people preparing to marry or newly married need to process.

This year my wife and I are also leading a series on marriage in our church's Young Adult Bible Study. I'm working on a great post for that subject.

Blog Pimping

2008-04-24T01:22:00.002-04:00

2 new blogs have entered my world.

One is actually my creation geared to the youth that I currently minister to.

The other is my buddy Marty who has entered the world of blogging with a strong first submission...definitely check him out.

Reaching Out

2008-04-20T22:45:00.006-04:00

Question, what would you do if these people showed up at your church?
I know a lot of churches today try to be "seeker sensitive" and wouldn't be caught off guard by their clothing, tattoos, or earrings but clearly they are not "church folk", or are they?
Well, I hope you go to a church that would welcome them. In welcoming them you would be welcoming some of today's church leaders.

Top picture, from left to right...
Rev. Phil Jackson, Associate Pastor at Lawndale Community Church and Pastor of "The House", a hip hop church.
Rev. William Branch, aka. The Ambassador. Pastor of Epiphany Fellowship Church in Philadelphia and lead rapper of the group Cross Movement.
Von Vargas, ordained minister, community leader, and rap artist.

Second picture, from left to right...
Rev. Rob Steinbach, huge friend of this blog, former Pastor of Freedom Church. (The downtown Baltimore church plant I ministered at for a little over a year) Currently serving at a church in Laurel, MD.
David Robinson, member of the group Christ Regiment and founder of 180 ministries.
Latasha Smith, aka. Sistah Dee, founder of Sound the Alarm Ministries Int.

These ministry leaders served on a panel aimed at assisting local churches in reaching out to the youth of today. There was definitely a hip hop feel to the event but at it's core it was about reaching out to people that look and act differently then what we are accustomed to in the church. I will talk about the event more at another time but I did want to post these pics and thank everyone that attended.

Me and The Ambassador.

"Reaching Out" : A Hip Hop Summit

2008-04-09T22:16:00.003-04:00

In previous posts I've alluded to an event coming up at my church.

On Saturday April 19th, Colonial Baptist Church of Randallstown, MD will host an event called "Reaching Out".
This event is a "town hall" style panel discussion on reaching the hip-hop culture. The keynote speaker for this event is the lead rapper for the group Cross Movement, "The Ambassador".
Our discussion is intended to educate church leaders, youth workers, and parents on what the hip-hop culture is and how to reach out to youth who embrace it.

The event will run from 1-5pm, is FREE, and is open to the public. If you'd like more info or flyers email me at you...@colonialbaptist.org

Here's a video of my pal Rob speaking to youth about the subject.

Recap

2008-04-07T20:45:00.002-04:00

So...
Our house is on the market and can be viewed here.

We went to CT Friday night and spent all day Saturday looking at houses.
We found one that we liked and put together a bid on Sunday afternoon.
Two hours later we were on the road headed back to MD and our agent called to tell us that our offer had been accepted. Yeah!

Everything is contingent on our house selling so now we wait.

Jesus on Money and Possessions

2008-03-27T14:40:00.003-04:00

“Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be."

“Your eye is a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is good, your whole body is filled with light. But when your eye is bad, your whole body is filled with darkness. And if the light you think you have is actually darkness, how deep that darkness is!"

“No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money."

“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

“And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?"

“So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need."

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today."
Mt 6:19-34

Wherever you are today I hope these words of Jesus have ministered to you.

Two of my friends have been church planters so I know that they can empathize with this reality. I'm not even in CT yet and everyday I am presented with a million things that offer me the opportunity to worry and fret.

I KNOW God has everything worked out, yet I'm not sure that always keeps me from heading down the path of worry. No matter how much faith I think I have and talk about having, in those moments I hear Jesus whisper, "Why do you have so little faith?"

Lord willing our home goes on the market on April 3rd.

It's all Available

2008-03-23T21:47:00.001-04:00

Everything is finally posted and available at the podcast page.

To Tithe or Not to Tithe?

2008-03-06T09:21:00.003-05:00

I've been crazy busy and haven't had a chance to keep up my private communication with many of you but while I have a moment this morning I wanted to post this and see what response it draws. I couldn't get it to embed so you'll have to click on the link.
Thank you to the person that pointed this out to me.

PS
I know I still have to tie up the threads on music and the seeker sensitive movement.
Also, I have placed an order for "God's ATM" machines for Lighthouse...hahahaha (watch the video)

Tithe Video

Myron Cope & The Terrible Towel

2008-02-27T12:01:00.004-05:00

Steelers nation waves our terrible towels in honor of it's creator, Myron Cope, who passed away this morning.

What is The Terrible Towel?
The History of the Luckiest Towel in Sports

The Terrible Towel was created by Myron Cope, the Pittsburgh Steelers broadcaster who needed a way to excite Steelers fans during a 1975 playoff football game against the Baltimore Colts. Cope urged fans to take yellow dish towels to the game and wave them throughout. The stands were filled that day and the Steelers always seemed to complete terrific plays when the towels were waving. The Steelers won, 28-10.

The team moved on in the playoffs and for Super Bowl X in January 1976, the Steelers introduced gold towels with the words "Myron Cope's Terrible Towel" printed in black. The Steelers went on to beat the Dallas Cowboys, 21-17, many claiming, "thanks to the Towel."

In 1996 Mr. Cope gave the rights to “Myron Cope's Official Terrible Towel” to the Allegheny Valley School in the Pittsburgh suburb of Coraopolis. The school provides care for more than 900 children, adults and senior citizens with mental retardation and physical disabilities. Proceeds from the Terrible Towel have helped raise almost $1.1 million for the school.

On January 15, 2005, during the Steelers playoff run at Heinz Field, The Greater Pittsburgh Convention & Visitors Bureau sponsored the “World’s Largest Terrible Towel Wave,” reaching out to millions of Steelers fans around the world, known amongst themselves as “Steelers Nation.” The team came back from what appeared to be a sure loss against the New York Jets, winning the game in overtime, 20-17. It appeared that the Towel had done it again.

The Steelers went on to host another home game the following week, January 23, 2005, vs. the Patriots. Another massive Terrible Towel Wave was organized but this time the Steelers lost, 41-27. The victors that day went on to win Super Bowl XXXIX in Jacksonville. But the Steelers didn’t give up on the Terrible Towel.

On Halloween, October 31, 2005, a special Terrible Towel was created to honor the retired Cope for his 35 years as a Steelers broadcaster and was waved prior to the Monday Night Football game between the Steelers and the Baltimore Ravens at Heinz Field. A limited edition of 35,000 were made, all with familiar "Cope-isms" like "Yoi!" By the way, that night, the Steelers won, 20-19.

For Super Bowl XL, played on Feb 5, 2006 in Detroit, a special edition Terrible Towel has been created for fans around Steelers Nation to help the team to victory, giving the Terrible Towel just one more chance to strut its stuff.